My journey, A blog of sorts, and advice welcomed

[legend0007]

I need some advice from my fellow peeps.... I was chatting with this guy and we were making plans to meet up (considering he was a top I'd be bottoming), I asked him if he used condoms and he said occasionally. I then asked if he was on PrEP and he said no and he tested some time ago negative. I know topping is a lower risk of catching HIV, but I didn't feel comfortable with that. Am I just being a bit rude/prudish in asking that? While I am on PrEP myself, and am testing every 3 months, he wasn't.

For those that are in the hookup scene, how do you all handle asking the questions for STI testing and if they are on PrEP? Or do you just go with the flow and just pray and test frequently. I just feel lost sometimes

no way man, you're not being rude. I have taken prep and will when i can afford it again, and have have dozens of tests in my life, but it's a constant worry. Luckily I've never caught anything not treatable.

I was going through a phase of meeting a few guys, but people were always happy to use a johnny, but I have done plenty raw, especially BJs which i know is just as risky. I'm sooo lucky.

I used to go to a dating society where I met my ex, and i did some work for, for rich guys/sportspeople where they all had an app and if they were in date for their tests etc they got a different wristbands to show when they had last been clean. It is quite a closed shop and expensive to be part of. It's a good system if people aren't shady with it, but there is nothing like that available to normal people here.

Regards your Q; I don't ask, i've pointed lads towards using a johnny, i keep them on me. Have spent a lot of worried days after not being protected tho

 

[mikeyank]

no way man, you're not being rude. I have taken prep and will when i can afford it again, and have have dozens of tests in my life, but it's a constant worry. Luckily I've never caught anything not treatable.

I was going through a phase of meeting a few guys, but people were always happy to use a johnny, but I have done plenty raw, especially BJs which i know is just as risky. I'm sooo lucky.

I used to go to a dating society where I met my ex, and i did some work for, for rich guys/sportspeople where they all had an app and if they were in date for their tests etc they got a different wristbands to show when they had last been clean. It is quite a closed shop and expensive to be part of. It's a good system if people aren't shady with it, but there is nothing like that available to normal people here.

Regards your Q; I don't ask, i've pointed lads towards using a johnny, i keep them on me. Have spent a lot of worried days after not being protected tho

I am appreciative that you answered Chac’s question, Max. Anything I might say is from 20-30 years ago, but you are out and about living life, meeting guys in today’s world and your voice on this issue is an important one. It makes me proud to know you guys through this forum. And of course, I am wishing great results for Chac on his journey.

 

[chac54]

no way man, you're not being rude. I have taken prep and will when i can afford it again, and have have dozens of tests in my life, but it's a constant worry. Luckily I've never caught anything not treatable.

I was going through a phase of meeting a few guys, but people were always happy to use a johnny, but I have done plenty raw, especially BJs which i know is just as risky. I'm sooo lucky.

I used to go to a dating society where I met my ex, and i did some work for, for rich guys/sportspeople where they all had an app and if they were in date for their tests etc they got a different wristbands to show when they had last been clean. It is quite a closed shop and expensive to be part of. It's a good system if people aren't shady with it, but there is nothing like that available to normal people here.

Regards your Q; I don't ask, i've pointed lads towards using a johnny, i keep them on me. Have spent a lot of worried days after not being protected tho

Thanks . There must be some stories Max with this adventure, a dating society??? Don't think I have heard of that...

 

[chac54]

I am appreciative that you answered Chac’s question, Max. Anything I might say is from 20-30 years ago, but you are out and about living life, meeting guys in today’s world and your voice on this issue is an important one. It makes me proud to know you guys through this forum. And of course, I am wishing great results for Chac on his journey.

All input is appreciated

 

[legend0007]

Thanks . There must be some stories Max with this adventure, a dating society??? Don't think I have heard of that...

I made it sound nicer than it is with the 'society' part; it's a business that arranges meet up and gets rich guys in touch with each other, I met somebody who took me there specifically to meet somebody else. Some seedy shit goes off there but i never got involved with particularly. It's ran by users and pricks actually. I'd write about it but they'd be knocking my door in.

 

[mikeyank]

I made it sound nicer than it is with the 'society' part; it's a business that arranges meet up and gets rich guys in touch with each other, I met somebody who took me there specifically to meet somebody else. Some seedy shit goes off there but i never got involved with particularly. It's ran by users and pricks actually. I'd write about it but they'd be knocking my door in.

I actually corresponded a few years ago with a young British lad who told me of “Daddies” who arranged parties with young guys and it sounds similar to the “dating society” that you spoke of. From both you and him, they do seem like parties to avoid. Rich older guys exploiting younger guys. Not a pretty picture indeed.

 

[chac54]

I made it sound nicer than it is with the 'society' part; it's a business that arranges meet up and gets rich guys in touch with each other, I met somebody who took me there specifically to meet somebody else. Some seedy shit goes off there but i never got involved with particularly. It's ran by users and pricks actually. I'd write about it but they'd be knocking my door in.

I actually corresponded a few years ago with a young British lad who told me of “Daddies” who arranged parties with young guys and it sounds similar to the “dating society” that you spoke of. From both you and him, they do seem like parties to avoid. Rich older guys exploiting younger guys. Not a pretty picture indeed.

Yikes! That doesn't sound good at all .

 

[chac54]

Whelp I no longer have a problem cumming with other guys (that anxiety is hopefully tucked away for now). I'm ready for a nap now hehe

Wishing you all a wonderful night and weekend!

 

[legend0007]

I actually corresponded a few years ago with a young British lad who told me of “Daddies” who arranged parties with young guys and it sounds similar to the “dating society” that you spoke of. From both you and him, they do seem like parties to avoid. Rich older guys exploiting younger guys. Not a pretty picture indeed.

Hmm this is so hard to respond to, ur rlly getting me thinking lol.

They aren't all old guys at pompeii, a lot of thwm are but there's a lot of business people or sports people in particular. I don't know what it's like over there but it's not acceptable for footballers here (soccer players) to be gay so they have to hide it, and even if they are not high profile, they do in case the become high profile. There are a lot of normal people that go to the meetings it's not like they r all creeps. i didn't explain shit proper sorry.

I dont think i should be spoutin off without explaining it properly tbh, i normally keep that shit low key

 

[chac54]

So I really haven't been on Grindr much lately as I kinda have a FWB thing going with a nice guy that lives like a mile down the street (more side type stuff for those dirty minds LOL). But I randomly got a message from a mid 30s guy that runs marathons and they basically insulted me saying that I should have some self respect and dignity for showing my fat body on there. And just because I can be a super snarky asshole when I'm insulted, my first lob back I replied to him that at least I don't have to point out people's faults and insult them to make myself feel better He blocked me. Fuckin asshole, didn't even have the balls to want to go toe to toe on insults. Where's the fun in that??! LOL

I've been called just about every name in the book, I have decently thick skin, but damn, some people are straight up trash.

 

[TouchKrazy]

So I really haven't been on Grindr much lately as I kinda have a FWB thing going with a nice guy that lives like a mile down the street (more side type stuff for those dirty minds LOL). But I randomly got a message from a mid 30s guy that runs marathons and they basically insulted me saying that I should have some self respect and dignity for showing my fat body on there. And just because I can be a super snarky asshole when I'm insulted, my first lob back I replied to him that at least I don't have to point out people's faults and insult them to make myself feel better He blocked me. Fuckin asshole, didn't even have the balls to want to go toe to toe on insults. Where's the fun in that??! LOL

I've been called just about every name in the book, I have decently thick skin, but damn, some people are straight up trash.

That's pretty messed up! Why would he even reply if you have nothing nice to say just move on. I don't blame you Chac for your reply

 

[mikeyank]

So I really haven't been on Grindr much lately as I kinda have a FWB thing going with a nice guy that lives like a mile down the street (more side type stuff for those dirty minds LOL). But I randomly got a message from a mid 30s guy that runs marathons and they basically insulted me saying that I should have some self respect and dignity for showing my fat body on there. And just because I can be a super snarky asshole when I'm insulted, my first lob back I replied to him that at least I don't have to point out people's faults and insult them to make myself feel better He blocked me. Fuckin asshole, didn't even have the balls to want to go toe to toe on insults. Where's the fun in that??! LOL

I've been called just about every name in the book, I have decently thick skin, but damn, some people are straight up trash.

I think that you had mentioned that you never used the “dating”, aka meeting apps before Chac. If that is the case, Welcome to the cruel world of the internet. Just like with political bullshit on twitter, people can be very “brave” and rude and insulting when hiding behind a screen name, saying offensive shit they’d never dare say face to face. You said the right thing back to him and if he blocked you, “Fuck him”.You are very fortunate to have met a FWB just a mile away. I’m sure that the “side stuff” that you do with him is a hell of a lot better than just your own right hand, (Or left hand). lol I think you’re doing great. Keep up the great work my friend!!!!

 

[chac54]

That's pretty messed up! Why would he even reply if you have nothing nice to say just move on. I don't blame you Chac for your reply

Exactly, my Momma raised me to keep my mouth shut if I didn't have nice things to say

 

[chac54]

I think that you had mentioned that you never used the “dating”, aka meeting apps before Chac. If that is the case, Welcome to the cruel world of the internet. Just like with political bullshit on twitter, people can be very “brave” and rude and insulting when hiding behind a screen name, saying offensive shit they’d never dare say face to face. You said the right thing back to him and if he blocked you, “Fuck him”.You are very fortunate to have met a FWB just a mile away. I’m sure that the “side stuff” that you do with him is a hell of a lot better than just your own right hand, (Or left hand). lol I think you’re doing great. Keep up the great work my friend!!!!

Yup, my first time on the apps, gosh it's been almost 3 months I've had my account on there. Time is sure flying by...

And yes, there is nothing like the feeling of busting a load with a cute guy pressing up against your body his hand teasing your cock and feeling their warmth all down your body well maybe busting inside someone, but haven't done that... Yet

 

[BrokeStraightBoys]

Exactly, my Momma raised me to keep my mouth shut if I didn't have nice things to say

Same

 

[chac54]

Haven't posted here in a bit... I just had my friend over and we had the most amazing cuddle session. Something about some skin to skin contact is just so amazing

Oh and a first for me, he came in my mouth as I was sucking him. Literally two minutes and he has me convinced I'm a cock whore for sure, I've never liked the taste of my own cum, but his I would put on tap all day LOL

 

[chac54]

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who commented and has supported me in my journey. I don't think I could have built up the courage to start putting myself out there. I missed the final bear weekend unfortunately due to the major fuckup by CrowdStrike, and had to work this past weekend recovering my works computers. So next year it will be, and there is still carnival coming up.

So a big hug to you all and a sincere thank you

 

[mikeyank]

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who commented and has supported me in my journey. I don't think I could have built up the courage to start putting myself out there. I missed the final bear weekend unfortunately due to the major fuckup by CrowdStrike, and had to work this past weekend recovering my works computers. So next year it will be, and there is still carnival coming up.

So a big hug to you all and a sincere thank you

Thank you Chac and I am thrilled that you are putting yourself “out there”, and are building up the self confidence needed. When you speak of your “friend with benefits”, I think that he is the perfect situation for you. To be involved in a “serious relationship” at this point is more than you should be looking for this early in the game for you. And thank you for sharing your journey with us. At one time, this forum was a community of on line friends who shared our joys and sorrows with each other, You are an “old school” forumites and I appreciate your posts very much. Continued good sucess to you my friend!!!