Is the word 'faggot' offensive or not???

[Jayman01]

Below are several definitions of the word Fagot and Faggot. Each one indicates that it is an offensive term toward a male homosexual in some way shape or form.


Definition

fag·got(2)    /ˈfægət/ Show Spelled[fag-uht] Show IPA
–noun
Slang: Disparaging and Offensive . a male homosexual.

Origin:
1910–15, Americanism ; cf. faggot a contemptuous term for a woman (from ca. 1590), perh. the same word as fagot

—Related forms
fag·got·y, fag·got·ty, adjective
fag·ot   /ˈfægət/ Show Spelled[fag-uht] Show IPA
–noun
1. a bundle of sticks, twigs, or branches bound together and used as fuel, a fascine, a torch, etc.
2. a bundle; bunch.
3. a bundle of pieces of iron or steel to be welded, hammered, or rolled together at high temperature.
4. bouquet garni.
–verb (used with object)
5. to bind or make into a fagot.
6. to ornament with fagoting.
Also, British , faggot.


Origin:
1250–1300; ME < AF, OF; of obscure orig.

—Related forms
fag·ot·er, noun
un·fag·ot·ed, adjective
Dictionary.com Unabridged
Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2010.

*****************************************************

fag·got2    /ˈfægət/ Show Spelled[fag-uht] Show IPA
–noun
Slang: Disparaging and Offensive . a male homosexual.


Origin:
1910–15, Americanism ; cf. faggot a contemptuous term for a woman (from ca. 1590), perh. the same word as fagot

—Related forms
fag·got·y, fag·got·ty, adjective
fag·ot   /ˈfægət/ Show Spelled[fag-uht] Show IPA
–noun
1. a bundle of sticks, twigs, or branches bound together and used as fuel, a fascine, a torch, etc.
2. a bundle; bunch.
3. a bundle of pieces of iron or steel to be welded, hammered, or rolled together at high temperature.
4. bouquet garni.
–verb (used with object)
5. to bind or make into a fagot.
6. to ornament with fagoting.
Also, British , faggot.


Origin:
1250–1300; ME < AF, OF; of obscure orig.

—Related forms
fag·ot·er, noun
un·fag·ot·ed, adjective
Dictionary.com Unabridged
Based on the Random House Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2010.
Cite This Source | Link To faggot
World English Dictionary
faggot or esp ( US ) fagot 1 (ˈfæɡət)

— n
1. a bundle of sticks or twigs, esp when bound together and used as fuel
2. a bundle of iron bars, esp a box formed by four pieces of wrought iron and filled with scrap to be forged into wrought iron
3. a ball of chopped meat, usually pork liver, bound with herbs and bread and eaten fried
4. a bundle of anything

— vb
5. to collect into a bundle or bundles
6. needlework to do faggoting on (a garment, piece of cloth, etc)

[C14: from Old French, perhaps from Greek phakelos bundle]

fagot or esp ( US ) fagot 1

— n

— vb

[C14: from Old French, perhaps from Greek phakelos bundle]


faggot 2 (ˈfæɡət)

— n
slang chiefly ( US ), ( Canadian ) Often shortened to: fag a male homosexual

[C20: special use of faggot 1 ]

'faggoty 2

— adj


Collins English Dictionary - Complete & Unabridged 10th Edition
2009 © William Collins Sons & Co. Ltd. 1979, 1986 © HarperCollins
Publishers 1998, 2000, 2003, 2005, 2006, 2007, 2009

**********************************************************

Word Origin & History

faggot

late 13c., "bundle of twigs bound up," from O.Fr. fagot "bundle of sticks," from It. faggotto , dim. of V.L. *facus , from L. fascis "bundle of wood" (see fasces). Especially used for burning heretics (a sense attested from 1550s), so that phrase fire and faggot was used to mean "punishment of a heretic." Heretics who recanted were required to wear an embroidered figure of a faggot on their sleeve, as an emblem and reminder of what they deserved.

faggot

"male homosexual," 1914, Amer.Eng. slang (shortened form fag is from 1921), probably from earlier contemptuous term for "woman" (1591), especially an old and unpleasant one, in reference to faggot (1) "bundle of sticks," as something awkward that has to be carried (cf. baggage ). It was used in this sense in 20c. by D.H. Lawrence and James Joyce, among others. It may also be reinforced by Yiddish faygele "homosexual," lit. "little bird." It also may have roots in Brit. public school slang fag "a junior who does certain duties for a senior" (1785), with suggestions of "catamite," from fag (v.). This was also used as a verb.

"He [the prefect] used to fag me to blow the chapel organ for him." ["Boy's Own Paper," 1889]

Other obsolete senses of faggot were "man hired into military service simply to fill out the ranks at muster" (1700) and "vote manufactured for party purposes" (1817). The oft-heard statement that male homosexuals were called faggots in reference to their being burned at the stake is an etymological urban legend. Burning was sometimes a punishment meted out to homosexuals in Christian Europe (on the suggestion of the Biblical fate of Sodom and Gomorah), but in England, where parliament had made homosexuality a capital offense in 1533, hanging was the method prescribed. Any use of faggot in connection with public executions had long become an English historical obscurity by the time the word began to be used for "male homosexual" in 20th century American slang, whereas the contemptuous slang word for "woman" (and the other possible sources or influences listed here) was in active use.

fagot

early spelling of faggot.
Online Etymology Dictionary, © 2010 Douglas Harper

**********************************************************

Slang Dictionary

fag definition
[fæg]

n.
a cigarette. : Hey, pal, gimme a fag.
n.
and faggot. a homosexual. (Derogatory.) : Who's the fag with the fancy hat? , Who're you calling a faggot?
n.
a repellent male. (Rude and derogatory.) : You creepy fag. Stop it!


Dictionary of American Slang and Colloquial Expressions by Richard A. Spears.Fourth Edition.
Copyright 2007. Published by McGraw Hill.

 

[Jayman01]

continued...

**********************************************************

Brief history of the word.

'Faggot', often shortened to 'fag', is used as a highly offensive term for a male homosexual .

There are a lot of myths about the origin of the term. It is clear that the earliest and original use of the word 'faggot' means a bound bundle, normally of kindling of some sort. The term was extended to bundles or groups of all types, especially of things that weren't of the same type.

As faggots were often used to light fires, the word faggot became associated with burning heretics. In the middle ages, people who repented from heresy wore the emblem of a faggot of wood to show that they had been saved from that punishment.

None of this, however, explains how 'faggot' comes to mean a gay man. There are various explanations people have attempted on the basis of the above definitions. The most common is that homosexuals used to be burnt as witches, and so calling a gay person a faggot is a reference to an ancient and terrible punishment.

This is false. The use of the word 'faggot' to refer to gay men is a twentieth century invention, and is highly unlikely to recall a practice of hundreds of years before. Also, there is no evidence that people ever associated witch burning with gay people.

More recent attempts to link it to a Nazi practice of using a bound group of homosexuals to burn bodies is even more ludicrous. Firstly, there are recorded instances of 'faggot' to refer to a gay man as early as 1915, well before the Second World War. Secondly, why would an English word like 'faggot' be a Nazi term?

Another common myth about the origin of 'faggot' is more plausible, but equally false. This is that the word came from the fagging system at British public schools (see fag). The claim is that fagging sometimes involved some kind of homosexual behaviour. However, fag in that sense isn't short for faggot. Also, faggot is an American term which only crossed the Atlantic recently, making it unlikely to be based on a British custom.

The most likely answer is surprisingly boring. Faggot or fagot was used from about the late 16th Century onwards as an insulting term for a woman. It kind of implied haggard, annoying and ugly. One source compares it to today's use of the term 'old baggage'. This would explain why it isn't really used to refer to lesbians.

It is probably this usage that was applied to effeminate men, originally in much the same way as the gay community might now refer to an 'old queen'. However this term, for whatever reason, became the offensive one and remains it.

The gay community seems to have done a lot to reclaim words once used against it, like 'queer', 'queen', and to a lesser extent, the shortened 'fag'. However it seems that the full term 'fagot' keeps a large degree of its shock value and offensiveness.

**********************************************************

I therefore conclude that there is significant evidence and reason for people to find the word 'Faggot' offensive. However, the word is just a name or a label we are not being forced to accept it or wear it on our clothing to identify us in a crowd. We each have the power within us to accept labels or to renounce them. It does not matter what the majority or minority of people believe or perceive. It is what you or I perceive or believe about our selves that is true. I AM that, I AM. (Either own it or do not own it.) People like children can be cruel at times. They may feel a need to put others down so they can feel bigger than they are. Most times they are pointing their finger in misdirection like a magician so that we are not paying attention to their flaws.

We have two choices here accept the label that society bears up on us or choose not to. If we choose to bear the label them we give away our power. If we choose to not accept labels and stand in our own truth then we embrace our power... Fighting and back biting over a derogatory word or term like 'faggot' only serves to segregate us as people and friends. "When spider webs unite they can tie up a lion..." I implore everyone to pull together as one and one voice we still have many battles before we will ever be thought of as equal citizens in this country. Let's not let something as trivial as a word tear us apart.

Bless your hearts and than you all for letting me share my thoughts on this matter.

 

[MissDeidra]

Yes. I don't like the word. My PERSONAL opinion.

 

[joninliverton]

Sticks and stones, it doesn't bother me one iota.

 

[cumrag27]

US Federal Judge throws out California Prop 18

...We each have the power within us to accept labels or to renounce them. It does not matter what the majority or minority of people believe or perceive. It is what you or I perceive or believe about our selves that is true. I AM that, I AM. (Either own it or do not own it.) People like children can be cruel at times. They may feel a need to put others down so they can feel bigger than they are. Most times they are pointing their finger in misdirection like a magician so that we are not paying attention to their flaws.

We have two choices here accept the label that society bears up on us or choose not to. If we choose to bear the label them we give away our power. If we choose to not accept labels and stand in our own truth then we embrace our power... Fighting and back biting over a derogatory word or term like 'faggot' only serves to segregate us as people and friends. "When spider webs unite they can tie up a lion..." I implore everyone to pull together as one and one voice we still have many battles before we will ever be thought of as equal citizens in this country. Let's not let something as trivial as a word tear us apart.

Bless your hearts and than you all for letting me share my thoughts on this matter.

Thank you Jayman01. I commend you for your need to be "socially responsible" through your writing. This essential concept of "social responsibility" seems to have gone by the wayside in much the same way as the obsolete 1966 slang word --"groovy".

With subsequent generations having missed the rampant racial and gender discrimination issues and selective enforcement of laws from this era, systemic inequalities in our society manifested itself in the legacy of social unrest of the 50's, 60's, and early 70's. This reaction from the citizenry was long overdue and provided the impetus for improving the lives of countless Americans.

I thank Jaymon01 for taking the time researching the orgins of the other "F" word. Without having some sense of our own history as a sub-culture, we have been too passive in defending outside threats to our way of life. Without knowledge of our own history as a people, we are setting ourselves up for falling victim to repeating the same mistakes of our forefathers. The Holocaust included 6 million Jews as brutally victimized by Nazi oppression. Countless numbers of gays were exterminated in the death camps during WWII in addition to the Jews. Overall, some 12 milion people total died in concentration camps at the hands of the Hitler and the Nazi Regieme. Because of the diversity of these additional 6 million victims, it is easier to sweep these under the rug, so to speak than give it the dignity it deserves. Gays were definitely a targeted group for extermination by the Nazis.

Today I read that a US Judge reinstated the gay marriage law in California on the grounds that the well-financed Prop 18 proponents approach was in essence discriminatory. Amen and Alleluia!!! Recently, the Supreme Court has further minimized the Miranda Rights as defined in the 1960's in an attempt to further diminish rights of self-incrimination protecting both you and me. The Supreme Court in the 50's and 60's was looked upon as protecting and restoring rights of the citizens at large, but especially the disinfranchised. It seems the reverse is true today. I admired the Supreme Court emensely when growing up during the 50's, 60's, and 70's and, quite naturally, I currently deplore the increasingly restrictive actions our current Supreme Court is taking today in an attempt to minimize and chip away at your individual rights.

My best advise I can offer you is take your government and history seriously. I have yet to find a European without an appreciation for history. Why are so many Americans so out of step with our European allies? Jay Leno makes fun of people on the street who haven't a clue how our government works. Don't have a simplistic view of history as only listings of dates and laws. American history is the story of our nation and, great as it may be, if we fail to understand it fully, we will loose out in the end. Learn from our mistakes from the past. Don't allow yourself the luxury of being turned off by government that only listens to large corporations and special interest groups. That is precisily what they want you to do.

It is up to us to make the lives of everyone better. My mother once observed that I was a cynic after graduating from college. I think often it is easier to oppose something on its surface so as not to look uninformed. However, things will only get better by actually getting your hands dirty and begin pitching in to help. My mother went on to to define a cynic as a person without "hope". A pessimist, if you please. Why would anyone in their right mind want to live in perpetual doom and gloom. That was the first day I realized my cynicism was actually my stupidity talking. Don't allow your cynicism to prevent you from doing something to help. America certainly needs everybody's help from everyone in all socioeconoomic stratum if we are to exist and aspire to be greater than some third world country. As we have fewer and fewer middle class people in the US, our national profile is resembling a third world country more with each passing day. Unless we care enough for the middle class to restore it to its proper place, our fortunes for the nation will not sustain itself.

Thank you for hearing me out.

 

[Jayman01]

Thank you Jayman01. I commend you for your need to be "socially responsible" through your writing. This essential concept of "social responsibility" seems to have gone by the wayside in much the same way as the obsolete 1966 slang word --"groovy".

With subsequent generations having missed the rampant racial and gender discrimination issues and selective enforcement of laws from this era, systemic inequalities in our society manifested itself in the legacy of social unrest of the 50's, 60's, and early 70's. This reaction from the citizenry was long overdue and provided the impetus for improving the lives of countless Americans.

I thank Jaymon01 for taking the time researching the orgins of the other "F" word. Without having some sense of our own history as a sub-culture, we have been too passive in defending outside threats to our way of life. Without knowledge of our own history as a people, we are setting ourselves up for falling victim to repeating the same mistakes of our forefathers. The Holocaust included 6 million Jews as brutally victimized by Nazi oppression. Countless numbers of gays were exterminated in the death camps during WWII in addition to the Jews. Overall, some 12 milion people total died in concentration camps at the hands of the Hitler and the Nazi Regieme. Because of the diversity of these additional 6 million victims, it is easier to sweep these under the rug, so to speak than give it the dignity it deserves. Gays were definitely a targeted group for extermination by the Nazis.

Today I read that a US Judge reinstated the gay marriage law in California on the grounds that the well-financed Prop 18 proponents approach was in essence discriminatory. Amen and Alleluia!!! Recently, the Supreme Court has further minimized the Miranda Rights as defined in the 1960's in an attempt to further diminish rights of self-incrimination protecting both you and me. The Supreme Court in the 50's and 60's was looked upon as protecting and restoring rights of the citizens at large, but especially the disinfranchised. It seems the reverse is true today. I admired the Supreme Court emensely when growing up during the 50's, 60's, and 70's and, quite naturally, I currently deplore the increasingly restrictive actions our current Supreme Court is taking today in an attempt to minimize and chip away at your individual rights.

My best advise I can offer you is take your government and history seriously. I have yet to find a European without an appreciation for history. Why are so many Americans so out of step with our European allies? Jay Leno makes fun of people on the street who haven't a clue how our government works. Don't have a simplistic view of history as only listings of dates and laws. American history is the story of our nation and, great as it may be, if we fail to understand it fully, we will loose out in the end. Learn from our mistakes from the past. Don't allow yourself the luxury of being turned off by government that only listens to large corporations and special interest groups. That is precisily what they want you to do.

It is up to us to make the lives of everyone better. My mother once observed that I was a cynic after graduating from college. I think often it is easier to oppose something on its surface so as not to look uninformed. However, things will only get better by actually getting your hands dirty and begin pitching in to help. My mother went on to to define a cynic as a person without "hope". A pessimist, if you please. Why would anyone in their right mind want to live in perpetual doom and gloom. That was the first day I realized my cynicism was actually my stupidity talking. Don't allow your cynicism to prevent you from doing something to help. America certainly needs everybody's help from everyone in all socioeconoomic stratum if we are to exist and aspire to be greater than some third world country. As we have fewer and fewer middle class people in the US, our national profile is resembling a third world country more with each passing day. Unless we care enough for the middle class to restore it to its proper place, our fortunes for the nation will not sustain itself.

Thank you for hearing me out.

Wow, thank you cum rag that was very well said.

 

[cumrag27]

Correction on earlier post

In my title and my article, I referred to California's Proposition 18. I'm sorry it should have been "Proposition 8", instead. I guess you could say I kinda goofed. I will try to do better next time.

 

[Jayman01]

In my title and my article, I referred to California's Proposition 18. I'm sorry it should have been "Proposition 8", instead. I guess you could say I kinda goofed. I will try to do better next time.

I noticed it but I chose to ignor it because I knew what you were referring too. It happens. We are only human... Bles your heart.

 

[tampa24]

It is up to us to make the lives of everyone better. My mother once observed that I was a cynic after graduating from college. I think often it is easier to oppose something on its surface so as not to look uninformed. However, things will only get better by actually getting your hands dirty and begin pitching in to help. My mother went on to to define a cynic as a person without "hope". A pessimist, if you please. Why would anyone in their right mind want to live in perpetual doom and gloom. That was the first day I realized my cynicism was actually my stupidity talking. Don't allow your cynicism to prevent you from doing something to help. America certainly needs everybody's help from everyone in all socioeconoomic stratum if we are to exist and aspire to be greater than some third world country. As we have fewer and fewer middle class people in the US, our national profile is resembling a third world country more with each passing day. Unless we care enough for the middle class to restore it to its proper place, our fortunes for the nation will not sustain itself.

Thank you for hearing me out.

Great points C.R. Thank you!

 

[zyl84]

stepping out of the shadows on this one...

words only have power when we allow them to. granted, the history of a word will always influence the power of that word. call me what you want. fag, faggot, queer, buttpirate, bootybandit, cocksucker, pole dancer, fudge packer, homo, abomination, disgrace - whatever you want, you will never get under my skin.

in my life, i've chosen my path. i haven't chosen my sexuality, it chose me. the hatemongers in this world choose to hate because they have nothing more to hold onto than their own insecurities hidden behind a book of a god who hates me. my god doesn't hate. i am more successful in my own life than any of those people. i dare any of them to enter into the world i live in and be half the human that i am. i'm more intelligent, witty and good looking than them. i consider myself to be an all around nice guy. what can those people say other than words that i choose not to allow to hurt me? absolutely nothing that they can't quote from a bible.

going back to the word itself and other meanings, sure. it can be hurtful. choose your words wisely and choose not to harm. if you choose not to harm, you yourself will not be harmed. it's a simple principle to live by... more people should. so i ask, why should we allow people to hurt us? if you rise above the word, you rise above the hate. don't be offended by a word. thanks. back to my corner now.

 

[BiGurl0527]

I don't care about the goof either and I loved it. I do think the subculture in the gay community is one that is as divided as those who stand on opposite sides of the picketing lines. It's good to be reminded that in the years growing up we all had to hide for fear of people with ignorance and pure hatred for someone wanting to have a connection with someone of with their own sex.

As a site that caters to bringing in straight males I am sure that we have closeted members among us. My hope is that when they come here they don't to deal with the hate they may encounter on the daily basis. I have lived in a funny world for a long time. Up until March of this year I belonged to church that not only made me hide who I was but broke me down to my core and made me believe gay wasn't okay.

I have mother who is openly gay now but she raised both me and my brother to skirt the issue of gay rights.It was okay to be friends with gay people but it wasn't okay to engage in the acts. I now know it was because she didn't want to us to be labeled or to be targeted. It took me a long time to be okay with my sexuality and something I am struggling with.

I do love my husband but I identify more as a gay male then I do in my heterosexual female role. I often feel like in the normal world I am walking around with a huge sign that outs me. This summer has created an awaking in me that I have never been able to come to on my own. Traveling to see the boys I was able to feel like I fit in. I wasn't weird for liking porn.

When I joined this site I thought I would throw myself into whatever it was. I had such a strong connection to what was going on that I knew something had broken down in me and had been set free whatever guilt I had for leaving the friends that I loved and the church that had healed me from many of my own demons.

Whatever your feelings maybe about the women on this forum please know for us we have been really each other guiding light in the months since being on this site. Think of it when you figured you weren’t the only one who likes boys. That's kind of how we feel after all this.

So really answer your question fag empowers me but for totally different reason that it would demean someone else.

 

[joninliverton]

So really answer your question fag empowers me but for totally different reason that it would demean someone else.

Exactly Boy Gusher and I cannot see why one single word has brought out so much grievance. FFS we are in a gay forum amongst gay or gay friendly people so we should allow to joke about the words that piss us off.

What does piss me off is that some of the members will kick off about me using the work faggot in a jocular fashion but when it comes to nasty models like Torin being bitter and twisted towards Aiden then you think its good and all part of the Broke Straight Boys image. I posted at the time that I was annoyed at what Torin said but was rebuked by a lot of you who now are having a go at me using the word faggot - yes a gay who jokingly uses. it. There have been many other cases of members calling the gay guys who David often uses as prissy queens etc - this is just as bad as the Torin situation.

Now you lot are beginning to piss me off and before becoming holier than thou you should go back over some of your old postings and revue them before writing so much drivel about the word faggot. End of..

 

[BiGurl0527]

Jon I hate to say it I know you were annoyed when writing that last post but I couldn't help reading it in an accent and picturing you typing away with such fervor. You bring up a great point that WE LOVE to be attracted to men who in not Broke Straight Boys land might not even give to looks out way and may even use those words about us. Just a thought everyone....

 

[joninliverton]

Jon I hate to say it I know you were annoyed when writing that last post but I couldn't help reading it in an accent and picturing you typing away with such fervor. You bring up a great point that WE LOVE to be attracted to men who in not Broke Straight Boys land might not even give to looks out way and may even use those words about us. Just a thought everyone....

I love you Jenn xxxx

 

[Jayman01]

stepping out of the shadows on this one...

words only have power when we allow them to. granted, the history of a word will always influence the power of that word. call me what you want. fag, faggot, queer, buttpirate, bootybandit, cocksucker, pole dancer, fudge packer, homo, abomination, disgrace - whatever you want, you will never get under my skin.

in my life, i've chosen my path. i haven't chosen my sexuality, it chose me. the hatemongers in this world choose to hate because they have nothing more to hold onto than their own insecurities hidden behind a book of a god who hates me. my god doesn't hate. i am more successful in my own life than any of those people. i dare any of them to enter into the world i live in and be half the human that i am. i'm more intelligent, witty and good looking than them. i consider myself to be an all around nice guy. what can those people say other than words that i choose not to allow to hurt me? absolutely nothing that they can't quote from a bible.

going back to the word itself and other meanings, sure. it can be hurtful. choose your words wisely and choose not to harm. if you choose not to harm, you yourself will not be harmed. it's a simple principle to live by... more people should. so i ask, why should we allow people to hurt us? if you rise above the word, you rise above the hate. don't be offended by a word. thanks. back to my corner now.

I am delighted that you came out of the corner to share those sage words with us. They were very inspiring.

 

[Jayman01]

I don't care about the goof either and I loved it. I do think the subculture in the gay community is one that is as divided as those who stand on opposite sides of the picketing lines. It's good to be reminded that in the years growing up we all had to hide for fear of people with ignorance and pure hatred for someone wanting to have a connection with someone of with their own sex.

As a site that caters to bringing in straight males I am sure that we have closeted members among us. My hope is that when they come here they don't to deal with the hate they may encounter on the daily basis. I have lived in a funny world for a long time. Up until March of this year I belonged to church that not only made me hide who I was but broke me down to my core and made me believe gay wasn't okay.

I have mother who is openly gay now but she raised both me and my brother to skirt the issue of gay rights.It was okay to be friends with gay people but it wasn't okay to engage in the acts. I now know it was because she didn't want to us to be labeled or to be targeted. It took me a long time to be okay with my sexuality and something I am struggling with.

I do love my husband but I identify more as a gay male then I do in my heterosexual female role. I often feel like in the normal world I am walking around with a huge sign that outs me. This summer has created an awaking in me that I have never been able to come to on my own. Traveling to see the boys I was able to feel like I fit in. I wasn't weird for liking porn.

When I joined this site I thought I would throw myself into whatever it was. I had such a strong connection to what was going on that I knew something had broken down in me and had been set free whatever guilt I had for leaving the friends that I loved and the church that had healed me from many of my own demons.

Whatever your feelings maybe about the women on this forum please know for us we have been really each other guiding light in the months since being on this site. Think of it when you figured you weren’t the only one who likes boys. That's kind of how we feel after all this.

So really answer your question fag empowers me but for totally different reason that it would demean someone else.

Boy Gusher thank you for sharing so much with us. This was both personal and inspiring at the same time...

 

[silvercamel]

I come at the word from a totally different angle:

When my sister was in grade school, she got her first real taste of the stage by appearing in a little production where she played the old faggot woman - the crone who carried a bundle of sticks and twigs (see Jon's post). So it kind of demythologizes the word and I think of that old English meaning everytime I hear the word.

Plus, I grew up reading Larry Kramer and although his book Faggots was not well received at the time in the gay community, Kramer went on to write The Normal Heart and became a premier gay activist, founding in the 80s ACT UP. But faggots remained for me a word that I sometimes proudly bare just as we as a community have appropriated Queer as something to be damn proud of.
We're Here. We're Queer. Deal With It!

So ends the history lesson.

 

[Jayman01]

Exactly Boy Gusher and I cannot see why one single word has brought out so much grievance. FFS we are in a gay forum amongst gay or gay friendly people so we should allow to joke about the words that piss us off.

What does piss me off is that some of the members will kick off about me using the work faggot in a jocular fashion but when it comes to nasty models like Torin being bitter and twisted towards Aiden then you think its good and all part of the Broke Straight Boys image. I posted at the time that I was annoyed at what Torin said but was rebuked by a lot of you who now are having a go at me using the word faggot - yes a gay who jokingly uses. it. There have been many other cases of members calling the gay guys who David often uses as prissy queens etc - this is just as bad as the Torin situation.

Now you lot are beginning to piss me off and before becoming holier than thou you should go back over some of your old postings and revue them before writing so much drivel about the word faggot. End of..

Jon you are an awesome guy. Nothing on in this thread was or is meant to be directed at any member of the forum in any way. I did not post this thread to attack anyone. I did it to offer an insightful way of discussing and processing how the word ‘fagot or faggot’ may or may not have impacted our lives as a whole. Some people are hypersensitive about the use of the word and how it is used to describe an act or a person. This word holds different meanings for everyone and different life lessons. I chose the word 'fagot or faggot' (whichever way people want to spell it) because the word has so much innate history and it has evoked a lot of controversy as of late. By processing the word openly we can all better understand its history and maybe even glean a better understanding of how or why we do feel the way we do about the word “fagot or faggot.’ Personally the word does not offend me when used toward me or other wise. I could care less…

However; I do try to be mindful of the way I use it in public settings because I am a public speaker. I also know that the only person who can ever make me angry or upset is me. So, if this word triggers a strong emotional out burst inside of me that serves as a catalyst for my hatred, disgust, or anger then I may need to do some work on me to overcome those fears. That cannot happen if I do not challenge myself to face my fear and become strong enough to physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually over come it.

Let me give you an example of what I mean. For years I used to always coin the phrase "as a rule of thumb" to offer helpful suggestions. Then one day I spoke at a safe house for battered and abused women. Later I was labeled as being insensitive to these women. I did not know what I did. So, inquired. I was told that first and foremost my physical size, being six feet tall and built like a tank, reminded most of them of the guy who beat them up recently and my approach of walking in and out of the isles periodically to keep their attention was seen more as being hostile and aggressive. OK, that was an eye opener. The biggest thing for me was when I found out that there used to be an old law known as the "rule of thumb." I guess in the old days back long ago men were held accountable for the actions of their entire family including heir wives. The nature of the law was to give men the powers to leagly punish their wives and children. My understanding is that the law said they could beat them with a stick as long as it was not thicker than their thumb. I though to my self, this law is barbaric and no longer legal. Why would this phrase instill so much fear and hostility among these women? I learned that is was not as much about the phrase that instilled hatred as it was the idea that this law was believed to be the origin of the idea that it was OK for a man to beat his wife. On a personal note I often thought that the people who put stock in this are a little overly sensitive. Then I remember that when I am presenting a topic I need to be heard. If the use of this phrase shuts people down then I am not being an effective communicator. There in lies the rub. To this day I have not used that term because I wish to be heard and taken seriously more over I don’t wish to hurt anyone’s feelings or emotions. That is my choice.

I laugh to myself sometimes when I hear black person call another black person a ‘nigger.’ I know that it is a socially unacceptable term for any race or culture to use. However; it seems that this rule does not apply when it is one black person talking to another black person. I have discovered the same holds true for LGBT folks. Many times in my hay day of bartending, clubbing, and stripping at the local gay establishments someone of the LGBT family would walk in and say, “what’s up: fags, queers, but fuckers, etc…” I am not saying it was ever right or wrong. I am saying that it happened a lot. To my knowledge no one ever took it personally. That does not mean it did not happen. I just never saw or heard of it.

I read lots of posts on here in the Forum and for the most part everyone seems to make every attempt to be light hearted and people like me even take some feeble attempts a humor. Occasionally, I get a PM or a chat asking what I meant by that or some one unloads on me with both barrels. Yikes, I hate it when that happens but “you can’t make an omelet without cracking a few eggs.” (I hope their aren’t and birds that can read on this Forum I might be in some trouble there. LOL (OK, that was my feeble attempt at humor))

I am a pacifist by nature these days. (Go figure and I was a US Marine rifleman, infantry squad leader, and presidential guard.) Who knows maybe I am trying to make up for all of the stuff I did while I was in that I would no longer condone (don’t ask, we will not go there.) I know who I am and what I am about. I did not know that until after my days in the US Marines. As we live we all learn, grow, and evolve.

The sole purpose of this thread was for anyone and everyone who feels compelled to respond to do it in a way that we can all learn and grow. There is no hidden agenda or malicious intent or finger pointing that is meant by this thread. I do apologize if it came across that way… Please, enjoy everyone’s posts and learn and grow with me.

Bless your heart and thank you for letting me share.

 

[smoothboilover]

It depends on who you talk to....

It's like with any minority of people, you cannot call a gay/bi person a Faggot unless you are one. Many of us don't like the term and it can be considered as derogatory as the infamous 'N' WORD. It depends on who you talk to.

I have known plenty of gay/bi guys who call each other Fag or Faggot as a term of endearment, just like many African Americans get away with calling each other the bad 'N WORD'.

Totally Straight people should have respect and not call Queer/Bi guys Faggot EVER. It's an empowering word for the Gay/Bi community. It's ours!

 

[Jayman01]

Sorry, there is either something going on with the Forum or my computer tonight. I triedt o post something like three times and for some reason it was rejected or it did not publish the full content. So, rather than retype it again I just deleted it as a whole. Oh, well... with computers these things happen.