joninliverton
BSB Addict
It's ok - I wonder why the post never came out properly - was ok to me. Do you normally see my posts ok - mind you I cut and pasted that from the bbc news site.
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Australian Roman Catholic Church admits child sex abuse
- Thread starter joninliverton
- Start date
It's ok - I wonder why the post never came out properly - was ok to me. Do you normally see my posts ok - mind you I cut and pasted that from the bbc news site.
JLipps4u
BSB Addict
Yes. I read it jsut fine. Highlight the text, and it will appear.
JLipps4u
BSB Addict
I am with you Grace, I just don't understand how anyone could find a child, sexually appealing.
I also agree that celibacy is unnatural, and only people with a true, God inspired vocation, should be allowed to commit to a celibate life. However, I don't think celibacy is the root of pedophilia, after all, some of our biggest pedophiles have been husbands and fathers!
I also don't buy the crap that a molested child grows up to molest other kids. I mean, perhaps in some isolated cases that might be true, but for most I don't think so. I can tell you this, I was molested by several people, and from an early age, and it has NEVER given me any desire to molest a child. AS stated earlier above, I just don't understand that attraction.
grace17
BSB Addict
I wish I could rewrite the past for you...
A cliché but never the less true...I believe , what doesn't kill you makes you stronger
I can read it just fine. Weird.
Ms. Kianna
BSB Addict
The article was cut and pasted from another source, so our system is not changing the type to white, for people that use the black skin. That is why people with the black skin cannot see the article unless they highlight it.
rbar
Well-known Member
I use the black skin and read it without a problem. weird.
tangogent
Well-known Member
Couldn't read the article, either.
Let's remember, all of us, that pedophilia does not = homosexuality, OK?
IMHO, voluntary celibacy is a psychologically healthful state.
TG
x
Let's remember, all of us, that pedophilia does not = homosexuality, OK?
IMHO, voluntary celibacy is a psychologically healthful state.
TG
x
joninliverton
BSB Addict
Absolutely TG
JLipps4u
BSB Addict
Oh TG, you are so right! As I said earlier, I was molested as a young child, and my molesters were all "Straight" married men, not "gay" men.
mikeyank
Long time forumite
I've always considered myself fortunate that I was never sexually attracted to children. What a nightmare it must be for people afflicted with pedophilia, being turned on by seeing young children and having desires to have sex with them. Obviously it is even worse for the victims, but I am sure that these people cannot control their desires for children any more than I can control my attraction to young men in their late teens and early twenties, (such as the age of the models on this site).
Although I would think that while the pedophiles cannot control their "desires", they certainly can control their "actions", just as I don't approach every cute young man I see, for there has to be a mutual desire by both parties, and so the pedophiles must realize that what they are doing is so very wrong. How could Jerry Sandusky or any of the scores of priests and clergy who have molested children, not realize that they are committing a horrible act?
I'm just saying that I thank God that I never had an attraction such as that, which would only lead to a life of misery for myself and for the victims of such a heinous act.
Although I would think that while the pedophiles cannot control their "desires", they certainly can control their "actions", just as I don't approach every cute young man I see, for there has to be a mutual desire by both parties, and so the pedophiles must realize that what they are doing is so very wrong. How could Jerry Sandusky or any of the scores of priests and clergy who have molested children, not realize that they are committing a horrible act?
I'm just saying that I thank God that I never had an attraction such as that, which would only lead to a life of misery for myself and for the victims of such a heinous act.
As I recall Laura, you said that you normally prefer to use the white skin background to view the posts. Changing the skin from black to white is what allowed me to see it.
Wow! I'm so sorry for what you went through JLipps. I'm just guessing but it sounds like they were not as much secretly gay or bi as they were just predators looking to take advantage of another's vulnerability. Preying on the weakest to give themselves an inflated sense of power, control and dominance. In the most cowardly way possible. They were sick pups. Again I am just guessing...but I bet some of those same men would have done the same thing to young girls if they had the chance.
JLipps4u
BSB Addict
Thanks TAmpa, and Grace. I am okay with the molestations. When I reached adulthood, I realized the sickness of these people, and I decided I was not going to spend my life being a bitter victim. Those people had no control over me and I had no reason to ever fear them again. If anything, I witnessed them living in fear, afraid that I would or could expose them. Seeing that fear in their faces was all I needed to help me to be okay. They are all dead now, and I still would not reveal them for they were all relatives, and while I hated them, I love my cousins and could never bring them that kind of knowledge and pain. Grace was right, what doesn't kill you, does make you stronger!
angelone
BSB Addict
Priests molesting children, yes that is very true that it has, is happening and will happen again. But I want to say that the number of children being molested by priests is miniscule compared with children being molested by family members and friends. As a small youngster growing up in Guam, I can remember like it was yesterday the number of times a uncle, cousin and even my step-father would playfully embrace me until their dicks would pop out and I became another statistic never to see the light of day. I say that no one no matter what age should be molested even if the person should want it. Yes, I said, "want it." After being molested so often by people who I was lead to believe "loved me", I began to seek out these same people to "do it again." It took years before I learned that what I thought was "love" was really down-right abuse. It still manifest itself in my decision-making, thoughts and dreams. Sick as it may sound I would rather be molested by a priest knowing that he will do it only once rather than a family member who would night after night tuck me in bed. Hatred for the church isn't half the amount compared to the hatred I have for my relatives, for those who delighted in fucking me and those who don't even have a clue.
mikeyank
Long time forumite
It is amazing to me that this "hidden perversion" has been around throughout the recorded history of mankind. People don't talk about it, but apparently they have been doing it forever.
I've always believed that mankind is flawed, and there will never be an end to war, as it seems to be inbred in man, I suppose there will always be a percentage of the population who molest the young as well. It is sick to my way of thinking, but it is obviously something that has always been there and I don't see it ever ending.
I've always believed that mankind is flawed, and there will never be an end to war, as it seems to be inbred in man, I suppose there will always be a percentage of the population who molest the young as well. It is sick to my way of thinking, but it is obviously something that has always been there and I don't see it ever ending.
grace17
BSB Addict
So sad...but I also believe it to be true
cumrag27
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Circle of Child Molestation
The circle of child molestation in families does not have to be endless. Even if the so called "adults" will not control themselves, at some point the victim can choose later on to not be a part of putting someone else in a similarly compromising position. There in lies the "HOPE" for future generations for some sanity. Sociologist like to presume that once molested, the victim will almost automatically pass it onward to the next generations. I have seen the consequences of incest from a professional viewpioint and from my own family viewpoint.
As a public school counselor, I have had heard of students being taught to drink alcohol as a little child and then, once suitably drunk, the victim was passed around among grandfathers, uncles, cousins, etc. like if the child was a bowl full of popcorn at the Superbowl, too drunk to resist yet hurting and maybe even bleeding all the same from the "loving" physical abuse they were forced to endure. That cycle was on-going for who can tell how many generations.
In my own family, my mother was sexually abused by her widower/alcoholic father. She grew up in the late 1910's and 1920's without the benefit of any family counseling, thinking her father was a "prince", until one day she finally realized this relationship was not normal. She was by her nature a highly creative, loving and trusting person. This was her fatal flaw wanting to be so accepting and trusting of others. Yet she knew she could not continue maintaining her relationship any longer with her father in her adult life. Even so, through my studies of sociology and psychology I shared with her, she took issue with the presumption that "all abused victims are practically predestined to offend in their own lifetime". This was one of those "gross generalizations" we were warned against while in school. While there can be no absolute guarantees made to stop the cycle of abuse, it seems all that we have any control over is our own thoughts and actions. My mother stopped the cycle of abuse with her own determination to not allow this to happen ever again, beginning with her. Fortunately, she came from a small family being "the only child". Her mother died at age 27 (before my mother's 4th birthday) while carrying her second child, unable to carry it to term. She died in 1917 in France during WWI.
Oddly, both of my parents were the "Only Child" in their immediate families. Therefore, I have never had an Aunt or an Uncle, and 3 of the 4 Grandparents one typically has were already deceased in my family by the time I was 1 year old. I am saying all of this because I am sure the size of my immediate family being so limited certainly contributed to not perpetuating the abuse. Furthermore, my brother's family lives in Germany beginning in 1965. Not every family has it so easy, that is with "mob control".
Sincerely,
Stimpy
The circle of child molestation in families does not have to be endless. Even if the so called "adults" will not control themselves, at some point the victim can choose later on to not be a part of putting someone else in a similarly compromising position. There in lies the "HOPE" for future generations for some sanity. Sociologist like to presume that once molested, the victim will almost automatically pass it onward to the next generations. I have seen the consequences of incest from a professional viewpioint and from my own family viewpoint.
As a public school counselor, I have had heard of students being taught to drink alcohol as a little child and then, once suitably drunk, the victim was passed around among grandfathers, uncles, cousins, etc. like if the child was a bowl full of popcorn at the Superbowl, too drunk to resist yet hurting and maybe even bleeding all the same from the "loving" physical abuse they were forced to endure. That cycle was on-going for who can tell how many generations.
In my own family, my mother was sexually abused by her widower/alcoholic father. She grew up in the late 1910's and 1920's without the benefit of any family counseling, thinking her father was a "prince", until one day she finally realized this relationship was not normal. She was by her nature a highly creative, loving and trusting person. This was her fatal flaw wanting to be so accepting and trusting of others. Yet she knew she could not continue maintaining her relationship any longer with her father in her adult life. Even so, through my studies of sociology and psychology I shared with her, she took issue with the presumption that "all abused victims are practically predestined to offend in their own lifetime". This was one of those "gross generalizations" we were warned against while in school. While there can be no absolute guarantees made to stop the cycle of abuse, it seems all that we have any control over is our own thoughts and actions. My mother stopped the cycle of abuse with her own determination to not allow this to happen ever again, beginning with her. Fortunately, she came from a small family being "the only child". Her mother died at age 27 (before my mother's 4th birthday) while carrying her second child, unable to carry it to term. She died in 1917 in France during WWI.
Oddly, both of my parents were the "Only Child" in their immediate families. Therefore, I have never had an Aunt or an Uncle, and 3 of the 4 Grandparents one typically has were already deceased in my family by the time I was 1 year old. I am saying all of this because I am sure the size of my immediate family being so limited certainly contributed to not perpetuating the abuse. Furthermore, my brother's family lives in Germany beginning in 1965. Not every family has it so easy, that is with "mob control".
Sincerely,
Stimpy
joninliverton
BSB Addict
Jeez, there are some very sad stories in this thread.
JLipps4u
BSB Addict
Jon, yes there are some sad stories, but some are also full of hope. Like Mikeyank says, pedophilia will probably always be around, but, it is our place to support those who have been victims, and teach them to overcome the tragedy and learn to thrive, not inspite of it, but because of it!
And while it is sad, it is a very good thing to bring out in the open, and discuss! It is so important for victims to be able to talk about this, it is a part of the healing process.
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