TOP 10 straight guys

[mikeyank]

Great stuff. We've got a perfect pairing here, both great guys, neither able to scratch out that little sliver of leverage that would result in the scoring of a real touché. And both interlocutors declaring the discourse finished at the end of each of his posts. Please don't stop.

Just joshing with you fellas. But you both write well and you're fun to read on a Sunday when not a lot else is going down.

Slim, Are you implying that we have the beginnings of a Joan Collins and Linda Evans rivalry, or perhaps Donald Trump vs. Rosie O'Donnel? Or is this more like a WWF match? In any case, I will stock up on popcorn and settle back to take in the action on this snowy Sunday morning in NYC.

 

[slimvintage]

Extra butter on that sir?

Slim, Are you implying that we have the beginnings of a Joan Collins and Linda Evans rivalry, or perhaps Donald Trump vs. Rosie O'Donnel? Or is this more like a WWF match? In any case, I will stock up on popcorn and settle back to take in the action on this snowy Sunday morning in NYC.

It's more the Oxford vs. Cambridge debating societies practicing to be Members of Parliament.

I've got corn chips too, and a big thing of Dippas.

 

[dande01]

Slim...you make me laugh...LOL.

 

[SayWhat]

This is now my favorite thread ever. Thank you, Rifle.

 

[slimvintage]

Slim...you make me laugh...LOL.

LOL, somebody had to do SOMETHING about those two haha...

You make me laugh and cry and just generally be a happy camper, David...
and I thank you for that and lots more

 

[**casper**]

In this scene



I'm grudge-fucking rifle.

Casper

 

[rifle]

Oh, good grief Casper, don't be angry. You've got your old pal, Slim, back behind you again, singing your praises. And now Mike and David are telling you how witty and charming your are. Why should you be upset? Why with that kind of top brass support, who knows? You may be pm'ing everybody again. If I were you, I'd certainly write them all to thank them.

And, for heaven's sake, don't fuck a grudge. Grudges spend so time much stirring up shit that you can't get the smell of it off you and it certainly won't wash off your dick.

You know, Slim, several of us have been rather concerned about you lately. We've always known that about half your posts have come from a creative mind and about half have been outsourced to your penis, but lately you seem to be thinking from somewhere no one can identify, a place where rational thought gets lost in ego-tripping romps through cloudy issues. At any rate, it's nice to see you moving back to your old self. Keep the sarcasm coming, Mister, when you can't get it up, it beats going down on yourself.

 

[**casper**]

Slim is a buddy but, he did not take sides. He said we were both acting up.
David was talking to slim
Mikeyank was just agreeing with slim
Ihateariz is in love with you and naturally took your side.

However, I feel I should offer and appology for the grudge-fucking thing. I wanted to plead temporay insanity but, everyone here thinks I'm crazy all the time so. I just decided to tell you that I'm sorry for the bad post.

I was kinda hoping you would have said something else because I made a list of things I was going to say, but since you didn't and I didn't even though I wouldve if you did ,but your great intellect kept you from doing what I hoped you would do but since you didn't do it and I don't get to do what I was going to do if you would of did it. well I just didn't know what to do so thought I would just appologise instead.
Casper

btw I only deleted my friends one time because I got mad at something David said awhile back.

 

[SayWhat]

You're such a drama queen.

How would you gather that I'm in love with rifle? I've never even talked to him directly. I did say "I love you for this" in response to a video link he posted (I think that was him, anyway...) but that's a far stretch from actually being in love with him.

I agreed with him because you act like a damned twelve year old. In fact, I think I could have a more logical argument with a patch of Astroturf.

And what bothers me more is that you'll beat around the bush and vaguely talk shit. Then when you're confronted about it, you act like everyone is picking on you or that you weren't purposefully talking shit.

I think the confusion about your orientation is not related to whether you're interested in gay sex. I think you can't figure out if you have balls or not.



By the way, here are some helpful links that will hopefully make your posts less fucking cryptic.
1) Use of punctuation
2) There/They're/Their and Then/Than
3) Firefox - It has an in-browser spellchecker.

 

[**casper**]

Thank you ihateariz,
that was so sweet and kind of you for helping me.
now on the use of punctuation...where do I find that?
There/They're/Their ..each one seems to be spelled differently..was that a typo?
Then/Than...once again spelled differently..do you have a multifaceted computer or is that a typo?
Firefox... Only you can prevent forest fires

 

[SayWhat]

Seems like you're getting the hang of it!

Here's the one for capitalization. Since it's an internet forum, this isn't 100% required. But if you're feeling like an overachiever, go for it!

Capitalization Rules

 

[**casper**]

This is sure hard work....
I can't find where the capitalization rules are but they could be where the punctuation rules were and I just can't find them. Is there a thread where all these things could be explained in more details? Maybe they could go to staples and get one of those easy buttons.

Casper

 

[slimvintage]

Haha, it's now Monday here and the twins are still at it:

Rifle has now confirmed that he just doesn't get it. A cursory read of Sunday's additions to this thread wasn't enough for him to identify which of his friends was being referred to, so his darts got aimed at odd targets. I'm assuming that he didn't read the posts carefully, because if he did...

On the other hand I might have been confused myself if I hadn't written some of them, given my loss of rational thought.

You know, Slim, several of us have been rather concerned about you lately. We've always known that about half your posts have come from a creative mind and about half have been outsourced to your penis, but lately you seem to be thinking from somewhere no one can identify, a place where rational thought gets lost in ego-tripping romps through cloudy issues. At any rate, it's nice to see you moving back to your old self. Keep the sarcasm coming, Mister, when you can't get it up, it beats going down on yourself.

How he knew I can self-suck is really extraordinary--but if he could do it the way I can he'd be on an ego-trip as well. As far as the cloudiness of the issue is concerned, I can't usually tell if it's cloudy or clear since it gets swallowed as soon as it issues into my mouth. That's not outsourcing my thinking to my penis, that's my penis thinking for itself. Yes SIR.

And the welcome return to sarcasm? I just like to josh with you guys and make you laugh. He's right, I must have a fashion designer mentality, cocks and creativity, that's me all over. I only put on those extremely flattering tights (that I made myself) and that big cape (four yards of midnight blue rayon satin cut on the bias) reluctantly. But everyone should go on "ego trips" if they're in a good cause. He knows that. He's an excellent guy and his heart is firmly in the right place. He may let himself down occasionally with the hit and run personal attacks that people keep referring to, but an occasional sideswipe doesn't take much away from the essential goodness of the person. It may simply reflect the complexities of life. We all have moments when we reveal ourselves more by the way we couch our assertions than though their basic content.

 

[rifle]

I read the posts very carefully, Slim. And I got the point. I was hoping you would. Obviously, you didn't. There have been moments over the past few weeks when you have not couched your assertions, you have practically bedded them. There have been some occurances lately on this forum when many were not amused, some were shocked, and some were actually frightened. Several times this came spilling out onto various threads and each time, when the possibility of getting something done presented itself, that pesky little peeniebrain of yours presented itself. It soothed and swooned and justified and quite often scolded the victim, as a result, the moments continued. I watched this from the sidelines. Finally, I thought I saw enough rational thought on your part that I might be able to do something. And guess what. You delivered probably the most deleriously sarcastic blow I've received in twenty years. We spent a good part of Sunday afternoon laughing. Now I've returned the problem to you. It's yours. You put on your midnight blue cape and deal with it. Several of us figure it's going to be quite a show!

http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b21nxQ6nffE

 

[**casper**]

Is it my immagination or is he (rifle) taking pot shots at me?

Did he just say that I'm scaring people? Was he insenuating that if it wasn't for slim they would have gotten rid of me?

Do I have to take a class on secret codes to know what you guys are talking about half the time?

Casper

 

[SGVBOB]

Kyler?????? As well, I am STILL waiting to hear of any future updates with that HOT TWINK!!

 

[yabba]

Remember guys Mateus is Mauricio.

 

[slimvintage]

I read the posts very carefully, Slim. And I got the point. I was hoping you would. Obviously, you didn't. There have been moments over the past few weeks when you have not couched your assertions, you have practically bedded them. There have been some occurances lately on this forum when many were not amused, some were shocked, and some were actually frightened. Several times this came spilling out onto various threads and each time, when the possibility of getting something done presented itself, that pesky little peeniebrain of yours presented itself. It soothed and swooned and justified and quite often scolded the victim, as a result, the moments continued. I watched this from the sidelines. Finally, I thought I saw enough rational thought on your part that I might be able to do something. And guess what. You delivered probably the most deleriously sarcastic blow I've received in twenty years. We spent a good part of Sunday afternoon laughing. Now I've returned the problem to you. It's yours. You put on your midnight blue cape and deal with it. Several of us figure it's going to be quite a show!

http://http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b21nxQ6nffE

I'm sorry Rifle, you're the guy who brings a cattle prod to the pingpong match. You're Mister Animosity. When your ego is piqued you go directly for the jugular. You're no fun. I'm really sorry to say this because as delusional as it is on my part, I'd have thought that under anything like normal circumstances we'd be very congenial you and I. I actually like your ponderous sense of humor.

But OK. So partially because of all the above and partially because of my peeniebrain (ha ha ha) you seem to think that last week I spoiled something you were doing right, or which was otherwise getting done right with you watching. And given this you finally had to step in to put a stop to me?

I'm sorry for you and "several of us" (hi guys), but I don't know what kind of show you're expecting from me and my cape. If it's anything to do with the link you posted, it's not available on this godforsaken island where I live, so...

deleteriously is one thing
deliriously is vastly another
which one were you making a stab at?

 

[rifle]

Oh, for God's sake. I do not bring a cattleprod to the pingpong game. I just don't back down when you wave your dictionary in my face. Why in hell would I say deleteriously and talk about laughter? You know deleriously, uncontrolled joy, running around, laughing - that sort of thing. Ha-ha-ha like.

Oh, and while we're on the subject, I don't go for the jugular until I have to. That's Dracula, you know. It's nice to try to label me with that, but it's not true. I will go for it metaphorically when there's a train coming, or a roof falling, or a time bomb ticking.

Pretty neat trick, too, putting quotes around the "several of us," as if I'm making that up. Heck, I don't blame them for not coming forth. It's not fun being slapped down, and I'm certainly not giving you other targets.

But the main thing, Mister, is how much I really don't like that old expression "I was only joshing." Now don't get me wrong. What you said was funny. (Except the ponderous part, but given that your humor can be so obscure, I guess I can forgive that.) In fact it was so funny that I've repeated it several times to friends today and we've all laughed. It just wasn't said in fun, nor was it expressed in fun, nor was it followed up in fun. Am I angry about it? Good Lord, no! I love a good joke. Just don't negate the quality of it by claiming you didn't mean it. That insults me a second time.

Oh, yeah, I never said I was doing anything right. Those are your words. I said "I might be able to do something." Obviously, I couldn't. I need to find you one of those Harry Truman desk signs, you remember, "The Buck Stops Here."

 

[vicekid]

DAVID,

I think we have the makings of an incredible new show here. Complete with our own STARS. I think you need to get the video ready for some ROCK AND ROLL'IN as we start (drum roll please):




Broke Straight Boys FORUM SURVIVOR ISLAND




Staring: Rifle, Casper, Slim, Ihateazirona



Premise: Broke Straight Boys Forumites at loggerheads on worldly subjects get transported to a remote Desert Island. Only one will survive the hardships and return to Forumland. Who will it be????? Cameras on the Island will film the unfolding drama and will be aired daily.

Each days episode will begin with this haunting song (think Gilligan's Island):

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale,
A tale of a fateful debate
That started from this forum post
Aboard this might site.
The post was on 10 straight guys
Our Scorpio brave and sure
Our debators set to talk that day
For a three hour debate, a three hour debate.
The words started getting rough,
Our forum getting tossed,
If not for the courage of our fearless Dave,
The forum would be lost, the forum would be lost.
The debators set ground on the shore of this uncharted desert isle
With Slimvintage,
And Rifle too,
Plus Casper the Friendly Ghost,
with IhateAriz
And the rest,
Here on Broke Straight Boys Survivor Island

So this is the Tail of the Debators
There yelling, for a long long time,
They'll have to make the best of things,
It's an in & out ordeal.
The Friendly Ghost and Rifle
Will do their very best,
To screw the others senseless,
In this tropic Island nest.
No phone, no lights no motor cars,
Not a single luxury,
Just talking, screwing, sucking,
As primative as can be.
So join us here each week my friends,
You're sure to get a hardon,
From Broke Straight Boys debators,
Here on " Survivor Island".

The End!

Live Long and Prosper

Vicekid