My Philosophy on life.

[BlakeBennet]

The way i see it.. you gotta live life for now, not tomorrow.. heres my philosophy and why i can genuinely say that i live my life to the fullest (the way i want). Because i think this way, not depressingly, but i live.

You have just been diagnosed with a terminal sickness which will take its toll in 3 months..

What will you do in those three months that you have regretted not doing in the past? Make a list!!!!! im serious! right now i want everyone to post their bucket list of what they would do for the next three months of their life.

once you have this list.... GO FUCKING DO THEM!

Yeah you dont have 3 months to live (if you do, dont say anything being snarky, you should take this message very seriously)

So great, you arnt dying.. But.. you could in the next few min... People die in car crashes all the time and never get a second chance to say, "Damn, i should do something really fast that i have always wanted to." No chance, they just die. thats it.. Lights out! Gone from this world only to bring pain and suffering to those around you that you loved.

But what about all those things that you regret not doing.. as far as im concerned, im not fucking superman, i know every time i breath/eat i have a potential to choke, drive my car, i could crash, go on a plane and suffocate from a pressure valve malfunction, sit at home watching tv/on the computer and have a heart attack..

Life is so fragile..

But why am i on your asses about this..

for those of you who have been keeping up with my ridiculous rants, you should know who Daniel is by now. He is my best friend, known him for quite a while.

he has Been told that he is HIV positive at age 22 turning 23 this august, lost his job, and cant find a new one, went through 5 interview at the omni hotel before they told him no, just today..

"This entire year has been the worst of my life, im so depressed and now i dont even want to get out of bed." Daniel S. 1:33pm aug. 3rd 2012. thats his real text to me after omni

But this kid still manages to come to my house, look at me and tell me that i help him forget by keeping him busy playing games and being their when he needs a shoulder.

I made him make a list of things he hasnt gotten to do... it was too late.

Unfortunately.. his one and only goal was to be a pilot fighting for the Air Force for his country.
He was in training and everything, one year away from his pilot license.

Because he WAITED for life to be convenient for him.. (financially, school, relationship) he waited for all these things first)

He lost his dream. 22, and cant be in the military. (physically unfit to perform)

Not only that, but his girl left him, hes alone, impossible to get a date cuz he is obligated to tell people about it..

So please, i want to see your list..

hypothetically If you have 3 months to live.. What would you do?

If you dont like this message, Dont respond. just go about your day like you just read nothing.
(Im fully aware his life isnt over, i know very well his situation, but it killed his dream he had for 15 years)
(this thread is not about HIV, if you want to talk about it, open another thread please, im not a part of it, its too much)

 

[cum2me01]

You have really prompted me to think about my dreams. I haven't done that for years. I'm not sure what I will come up with throught this process, but know it will be fun. I'll leave you with a couple of things that first come to my mind. I would like to see the Grand Canyon and I would like to go to London someday. (maybe even see the crown jewels). Thanks for this inspiring post!

 

[JLipps4u]

You have no idea how close to home you just hit with this post! I can't even deal with it now. Will try to later.

 

[peterh6308]

This really hits home for me. 3 yrs ago when my partner died we did a bucket list 4 months prior to his death not knowing it would be some of the last things he did. We were/I am very simple kind of people so this list consisted of regular everyday kind of wants. He died in January so the Sept before we were sitting around and were talking about our life together and all we had gone through (ups-downs) after 18yrs together that we still loved and more importantly liked each other. So i didn't just lose my lover, but I lost my best friend. Well anyway! This particular Saturday I started to write down what he wanted to do b4 he died (us not knowing that Jan he would be gone) and #1 he wanted to go to a all you can eat chinese buffet. What makes this so funny is he hated chinese food the next friday we went. He liked the rice and udon noodles and blamed me for not ever making him eat this b4 #2 He wanted to go to his Parents cabin up in the woods and fish. 3 weeks after we went up there with his Brother and his wife for a 3 day weekend. William was getting pretty frail by then, but he always" manned up " when it came to fishing, camping or hunting, so there he was standing in the river fly fishing and as I watched him and his brother together a feeling came over me that this might be his last time ever fishing again. I started to well up in tears, not sad ones but happy ones because he was so in his element. #3 He wanted to have a BBQ with all friends and family together. It took until Oct to get almost everyone together so this was quite the challenge request. He didn't last that long that day, but we had a great time anyway. As I look back almost 4 yrs later to when we wrote and did these things together, it makes so happy that these simple things in life fishing, eating chinese buffet and bbq with family and friends is also my bucket list and I live it everyday, week, month and year. I guess i'm realizing that we weren't really simple people just not complicated individuals and thats what we loved/liked about each other and thats what I love/like about myself. Good day in Seattle today, I'm feeling happy with great memories.

 

[Beth]

This really hits home for me. 3 yrs ago when my partner died we did a bucket list 4 months prior to his death not knowing it would be some of the last things he did. We were/I am very simple kind of people so this list consisted of regular everyday kind of wants. He died in January so the Sept before we were sitting around and were talking about our life together and all we had gone through (ups-downs) after 18yrs together that we still loved and more importantly liked each other. So i didn't just lose my lover, but I lost my best friend. Well anyway! This particular Saturday I started to write down what he wanted to do b4 he died (us not knowing that Jan he would be gone) and #1 he wanted to go to a all you can eat chinese buffet. What makes this so funny is he hated chinese food the next friday we went. He liked the rice and udon noodles and blamed me for not ever making him eat this b4 #2 He wanted to go to his Parents cabin up in the woods and fish. 3 weeks after we went up there with his Brother and his wife for a 3 day weekend. William was getting pretty frail by then, but he always" manned up " when it came to fishing, camping or hunting, so there he was standing in the river fly fishing and as I watched him and his brother together a feeling came over me that this might be his last time ever fishing again. I started to well up in tears, not sad ones but happy ones because he was so in his element. #3 He wanted to have a BBQ with all friends and family together. It took until Oct to get almost everyone together so this was quite the challenge request. He didn't last that long that day, but we had a great time anyway. As I look back almost 4 yrs later to when we wrote and did these things together, it makes so happy that these simple things in life fishing, eating chinese buffet and bbq with family and friends is also my bucket list and I live it everyday, week, month and year. I guess i'm realizing that we weren't really simple people just not complicated individuals and thats what we loved/liked about each other and thats what I love/like about myself. Good day in Seattle today, I'm feeling happy with great memories.

Wow Peter,
First, thanks for sharing that; I would say you have been blessed. Second, I would like to hear more about some of the things that you have done since his passing, please. I think Blake is on the right track; like you, we all have to enjoy life, whatever comes our way. The best thing we have is each other; the willingness to connect with someone else, for however long, is a gift.

 

[grace17]

Gosh. I'm a bit overwhelmed too. This is a great thread, Blake, and I'll have a think and get back to you with more coherent conversation than I'm capable of at the moment.

 

[another1]

i had always wanted to go to a concert at the race track. i don't drive so i use transit or cabs. getting to the race track was never a problem. the problem was getting home.
in another thread i talk about meeting a guy and recently getting in touch with him.
well he works at the track.
he invited me to a concert. i of course accepted. then i thought about the return home issue that had always existed. i raised the issue with him and said i live near by you and will bring you home after the concert.
i now have the grand canyon and the colorado river to visit. because the universe is so kind to me, i wonder how that will happen. and it will.
you see i believe that what you ask for truly believing will happen, will happen for you. but i am told that i must be pure of heart and should seek pardon for and forgive any offenses. which is my fourth wish. to be a better friend to those who reach out to me and love them more than myself. for that i seek pardon for my offenses and forgive any offense taken!

 

[joninliverton]

I loved the film Bucket list. Prior to my late dad passing on he did loads of stuff such as visit the Egyptian tombs, visit some friends in Australia, get married to his 2nd wife in Canada, learn how to operate a PC and use the internet and other stuff. I think when you know your days are numbered you start to think of these things. Maybe we should be thinking about such things before we get older and receive such bad news, instead of just going for day to day doing normal stuff.

 

[fwcoach]

Thanks, Blake. What I would want to to--1. spend the night in (or at least see) the Lincoln bedroom in the White House. 2. Go back to London and tour the English countryside. 3. Divide my assets among my family and special friends. 4. Give money to random people whom I don't know. 4. Find friends I have not seen a long time. 5. Have one more stay in NYC. 6. Travel through the few states in the US I have not been to yet. 7. And I mean this very sincerely: take Blake Bennett to dinner in Texas. A guy with the personality and caring spirit that Blake possesses would be a joy to sit down with and just talk. I'm already working on my list of to do things! Thanks, Blake, for reminding us that we need to get started on things that would help complete our lives. fwcoach

 

[peterh6308]

Wow Peter,
First, thanks for sharing that; I would say you have been blessed. Second, I would like to hear more about some of the things that you have done since his passing, please. I think Blake is on the right track; like you, we all have to enjoy life, whatever comes our way. The best thing we have is each other; the willingness to connect with someone else, for however long, is a gift.

Thanks Beth. My life, hobbies and friends really haven't changed to much in the last 25 or so years. My immediate family has gotten bigger, Williams 2 kids are teenagers now, but I still do the same things we did together weekly. Golf, tennis and shoot pool I just have different friends I do this stuff with now. The pain I felt when he passed is now very happy memories of a wonderful guy. We brought out the best in each other and I still strive to be a better, kinder and loving person. This was the gift he left me, and I cherish it with all my heart.

 

[rbar]

Thanks Beth. My life, hobbies and friends really haven't changed to much in the last 25 or so years. My immediate family has gotten bigger, Williams 2 kids are teenagers now, but I still do the same things we did together weekly. Golf, tennis and shoot pool I just have different friends I do this stuff with now. The pain I felt when he passed is now very happy memories of a wonderful guy. We brought out the best in each other and I still strive to be a better, kinder and loving person. This was the gift he left me, and I cherish it with all my heart.

Peter, that was just beautiful.

 

[joninliverton]

Thanks Beth. My life, hobbies and friends really haven't changed to much in the last 25 or so years. My immediate family has gotten bigger, Williams 2 kids are teenagers now, but I still do the same things we did together weekly. Golf, tennis and shoot pool I just have different friends I do this stuff with now. The pain I felt when he passed is now very happy memories of a wonderful guy. We brought out the best in each other and I still strive to be a better, kinder and loving person. This was the gift he left me, and I cherish it with all my heart.

Peter, your post was both beautiful and heart breaking, if that is at all possible. Big hugs xxx

 

[BlakeBennet]

You have really prompted me to think about my dreams. I haven't done that for years. I'm not sure what I will come up with throught this process, but know it will be fun. I'll leave you with a couple of things that first come to my mind. I would like to see the Grand Canyon and I would like to go to London someday. (maybe even see the crown jewels). Thanks for this inspiring post!

Well im glad you saw the point of the post... I know im only 22.. But you guys can seriously look at the BTS and see my vacations practically documented! i have gotten to go to NYC, Washington DC, and See a solar eclipse with my eyes!

DID I MENTION! on my way to NYC i was traveling early in the morning, and as i was looking out the window of the plane at 36,000 ft up in the air.... I see the most amazing natural phenomenon to take place at that altitude!

I SAW a SHOOTING STAR! a meteorite had entered the earths atmosphere close enough that i could actually see the girth of the tail as it shoot towards the ground before dissipating leaving behind a faint but still noticeable plasma trail. started where i was looking up and ended with me looking right at it at almost eye level... it was the most beautiful thing i had ever seen.

I got to go to denver for a week just to hangout and have a good time, it was fantastic! i got to see majority of the colorado mountains! i got to see the Planetary nebula in Orion's sword!

so many things that i havent got to do my whole life i have done in the past 6 months.

So its possible, you just gotta find your means of doing it.

 

[BlakeBennet]

You have no idea how close to home you just hit with this post! I can't even deal with it now. Will try to later.

:-/
well i look forward to your well thought out list.

Dont make me grade yall now. lol jk jk

 

[BlakeBennet]

This really hits home for me. 3 yrs ago when my partner died we did a bucket list 4 months prior to his death not knowing it would be some of the last things he did. We were/I am very simple kind of people so this list consisted of regular everyday kind of wants. He died in January so the Sept before we were sitting around and were talking about our life together and all we had gone through (ups-downs) after 18yrs together that we still loved and more importantly liked each other. So i didn't just lose my lover, but I lost my best friend. Well anyway! This particular Saturday I started to write down what he wanted to do b4 he died (us not knowing that Jan he would be gone) and #1 he wanted to go to a all you can eat chinese buffet. What makes this so funny is he hated chinese food the next friday we went. He liked the rice and udon noodles and blamed me for not ever making him eat this b4 #2 He wanted to go to his Parents cabin up in the woods and fish. 3 weeks after we went up there with his Brother and his wife for a 3 day weekend. William was getting pretty frail by then, but he always" manned up " when it came to fishing, camping or hunting, so there he was standing in the river fly fishing and as I watched him and his brother together a feeling came over me that this might be his last time ever fishing again. I started to well up in tears, not sad ones but happy ones because he was so in his element. #3 He wanted to have a BBQ with all friends and family together. It took until Oct to get almost everyone together so this was quite the challenge request. He didn't last that long that day, but we had a great time anyway. As I look back almost 4 yrs later to when we wrote and did these things together, it makes so happy that these simple things in life fishing, eating chinese buffet and bbq with family and friends is also my bucket list and I live it everyday, week, month and year. I guess i'm realizing that we weren't really simple people just not complicated individuals and thats what we loved/liked about each other and thats what I love/like about myself. Good day in Seattle today, I'm feeling happy with great memories.

thank you for sharing.

im so glad that you guys did that.

i know it wasnt your goal to make me cry, but i did/am, only because i could see it.

its a hard story to tell im sure, but i could also tell you enjoyed telling it, because you could see him again, living out the details of your memories. :')

damn dude, gets me when true love is involved.

 

[peterh6308]

Jon yes it does make sense. Blake we were probably around your age when we met. One thing we never did (at least on purpose) was take each other granted. We were best friends so respecting each came easy as did the love because we liked each other. When that person enters your life, never change for them but change together as a team. True love shouldn't be hard, but just come naturally with no effort and when this does you'll know it's real. I haven't cried in pain in over a year and that is from personnally growth, William I know is proud of me for this because he was the kind of Guy that would have blamed himself for his death knowing what is was going to do to me. (What a great dude). I can read people pretty good and Blake you are this kind of guy! family and friends needs come first. Thats great but don't forget your needs and wants also we tend to let ourselves get boggled down with other peoples stuff. My family knows that right now in my life I can honestly say I have no problems, but the little ones I do tend to are theirs.

 

[grace17]

This probably sounds extreme, but sometimes I wish everyone at some point in their lives were diagnosed with a seriously debilitating illness, or a life changing event for a short time before their good health or good fortune was restored. This way everyone would truly understand how dramatically your life can change in the space of a single heartbeat. The phrase 'taking for granted' would no longer exist and compassion for others and energy for life would be it's replacement.

As far as living life for today goes...Peter's beautiful story about the time he shared with William and how he's lived his life since is inspirational. And, Blake's sheer joy at seeing a shooting star from an unexpected perspective, is on another level, but equally inspirational.

If I live my life keeping these two stories close to my heart I think I'd be doing just fine.

 

[joninliverton]

Jon yes it does make sense. Blake we were probably around your age when we met. One thing we never did (at least on purpose) was take each other granted. We were best friends so respecting each came easy as did the love because we liked each other. When that person enters your life, never change for them but change together as a team. True love shouldn't be hard, but just come naturally with no effort and when this does you'll know it's real. I haven't cried in pain in over a year and that is from personnally growth, William I know is proud of me for this because he was the kind of Guy that would have blamed himself for his death knowing what is was going to do to me. (What a great dude). I can read people pretty good and Blake you are this kind of guy! family and friends needs come first. Thats great but don't forget your needs and wants also we tend to let ourselves get boggled down with other peoples stuff. My family knows that right now in my life I can honestly say I have no problems, but the little ones I do tend to are theirs.

Jeez, when I eventually settle down I hope I end up with someone like you..

 

[peterh6308]

Jeez, when I eventually settle down I hope I end up with someone like you..

Extra Extra Extra single guy in Seattle with almost no hang-ups lol. Now Jon this would be quite the long distance relationship huh!

 

[Frontier]

Wow, I guess I must have needed a good cry. Fantastic post. Bucket list to follow after tears wiped away.