How do you attract young men?

[mitch768292]

But then again, alot of the older guys here seem to be really attracted to young guys, so it would almost seem that older guys find men their own age not too appealing

When I was young, I thought that too, and there is certainly some validity to that statement. But, what I have found in my own personal experience is that I had trouble getting a date with someone my own age because they all insist on dating guys under 30. So while I did not find older men unattractive, there certainly are a lot of "older" guys who do. I wish I had found that perfect relationship 20 years ago, one that would have been for life.

Even more interesting is that you see the same thing among older straight men. One of my straight friends, who is 50, told me flat out that he would not date a woman over 35. When straight men are on the hunt the second time around they always look for a woman much younger.

 

[mitch768292]

I think in general you may be right. However; I think it is all about your paradigm on life. Younger guys want to love and enjoy life. I think it is more about the fact they just left mom and dad and they want to enjoy life with people their own age, along with the social dichotomy people mom and dad's age tend to be a little stuffy and rigid in their beliefs and likes and dislikes. I don't feel it is about like and dislike as much as social acceptance. Another factor in there it the whole concept of making out with someone as old as your parents is; If they come across like your mom or dad, it can paint the false visual image stimulus that they are making out with their mom or dad. Yuck!!! Just try to imagine your parents actually having sex and I think you can get the idea when you realize how uncomfortable that thought can be.

I do believe that as we get older we are attracted to younger people but I feel this is more about eye candy and pheromones than anything. Other contributing factors are the facts that most older people have become set in their ways have become less flexible in their opinions. I.e. I love music. However; for the life of me try as I may, I really can't listen to gangster rap or rage metal where you cannot understand a single word. Yet, many of today's youth embrace it and find it to be awesome. Another factor is the feeling that we are not as old as our physical age when being around youth. Personally speaking I have a lot of youthful friends between the ages of 18 and 26 currently. A lot of them are straight some are bisexual and very few are gay.

I think there may be some truth to the chicken hawking myth. LOL. I.e. younger gay men feel like older gay men are praying on them. It is like hunting season. When turkeys are in season you see deer every where and almost no turkeys ever. When deer are in season you tend to see turkeys every where you go. LOL

In conclusion I would say likes and dislikes are phrases that could be used to describe our interactions. However; I believe that it is how we perceive our reality that decides the ultimate fate. I am more attracted to guys in my own age group intellectually and sexually. I have always looked at the person for what they bring to the table besides good looks. I cannot deny that a hot sexy young guy doesn't set my blood on fire from time to time. When I need to work at finding more that looks is when I get bored and want to move on... So, I love to date and get to know people before any sexual commitments make thing awkward.

Live long, live well, love much, and prosper... Thank you for letting me share.

Very, Very, Very true jayman. You allude to something I have always known......Sex with young men and frolicking around is fun for a short time. But if sex lasts for an hour, what do you and the young guy do with the other 23 hours on a Saturday? I spent some time with a 19 yr old a couple of months ago.
After the first night I did not know what to do with him. There was nothing to talk about, not music (Oh God, don't get me started on that!), Fashion (he had no taste in clothes), current events (he thought that meant the latest Paris Hilton news), movies - I never heard of anything that he had ever seen and vice-versa. I mean there was nothing to discuss on an "adult" level. All he wanted to do was smoke pot and skateboard, while I wanted to go to the beach and get a tan, which he did not understand (he had Tyler-skin). I had no clue about his youth "culture" and he was totally ignorant of anything that happened before the year 2000. He thought Jimmy Carter was the president when I was born in 1958 and he had never heard of Eisenhower! He did not know who Bette Davis was! How can you be gay and not know that?

I got so bored on the second day that I sent him home.

 

[GreatLakes2]

I got so bored on the second day that I sent him home.

And on the third day, you 'rose' again.....

Fortunately, not all youth are like that. Just like not everyone over 45 walks around with a plastic squeeze coin purse and gathers in groups at McDonalds and order nothing but coffee, and talk about their colonoscopies until it is time to go home and watch reruns of Matlock.

But alas, the stereotypes do have some truth.

 

[mitch768292]

And on the third day, you 'rose' again.....

Fortunately, not all youth are like that. Just like not everyone over 45 walks around with a plastic squeeze coin purse and gathers in groups at McDonalds and order nothing but coffee, and talk about their colonoscopies until it is time to go home and watch reruns of Matlock.

But alas, the stereotypes do have some truth.

WOW! My grandfather carried one of those change purses. That brings some memories. But you know what? Those little things are handy for the simple reason that it gives you more control over the change. I am always fumbling around with hand full of change trying to find the correct coins to give the cashier at the store.

So, this thing of gathering at McDonalds to drink coffee is a nationwide phenomena. They do that down here too. I see it all the time, if I happen to go to a fast food joint in the morning.

 

[canada]

What do they want? What makes an older man more attractive to them?

Is it:

1. Your looks?
2. Your personality?
3. Money?

I just got home. I spent the last 4 hours with about 5 hunks 21 to 24. They varied from hot to beautiful. It was a wonderful night. I was in heaven because any of these 5 hotties would be top rated on Broke Straight Boys How did I attrack these hunks to me? The answer was that my goal was to get to really know these people (not just beautiful young meat). All of these "hunks" asked me to come back every Sunday night to be with them. WHY? My goal was to get to know and understand these young people. My goal was not to get into their pants. One of the young people I have the biggest crush on, but I will not ruin it by trying to hook up with him. Just be happy being with him. I can appreciate the hottie without trying to suck him off. If something was ever to happen than Ryan and I were ever to have an intimate relationship, that would be great, but just being with him makes me feel young and excited.

 

[slimvintage]

I just got home. I spent the last 4 hours with about 5 hunks 21 to 24. They varied from hot to beautiful. It was a wonderful night. I was in heaven because any of these 5 hotties would be top rated on Broke Straight Boys How did I attrack these hunks to me? The answer was that my goal was to get to really know these people (not just beautiful young meat). All of these "hunks" asked me to come back every Sunday night to be with them. WHY? My goal was to get to know and understand these young people. My goal was not to get into their pants. One of the young people I have the biggest crush on, but I will not ruin it by trying to hook up with him. Just be happy being with him. I can appreciate the hottie without trying to suck him off. If something was ever to happen than Ryan and I were ever to have an intimate relationship, that would be great, but just being with him makes me feel young and excited.

You probably seem young and excited to them too. Are they all gay? Or was this a Straightie Sunday?

You lucky dog. Good luck with Ryan.

 

[canada]

You probably seem young and excited to them too. Are they all gay? Or was this a Straightie Sunday?

You lucky dog. Good luck with Ryan.

It was a great night. I really enjoyed just being with them. We talked and just plain simply had fun.

In regards to question of their sexual orientation -

1 guy was 100% straight because his girlfriend was with him. She is hot and honestly I am as attracted to her just as much. She is not just good looking but just plain nice.

2 of the guys I am about 90% sure are straight. They didn't mention they had girlfriends, but they really seemed straight.

1 of the guys (21 year old blond, just permanently returned home from college, was in band and is not a part of the rest of the group) I think could be bi. Just a feeling.

Now that leaves Ryan (a Kurt Wild look alike). Last Sunday night a very hot 21 year old girl was talking to me and she basicly told me she wanted to jump Ryan's bones. She just wanted him. I told Ryan that she was interested in him and he said great, but never went near her. I asked him later after she left why he wasn't interested and he said he had a girlfriend. Last night the topic of Ryan having a girlfriend came up with one of his friends. Ryan's friend said that Ryan did not have a girlfriend. So Ryan i am not sure about.

 

[mikeyank]

It was a great night. I really enjoyed just being with them. We talked and just plain simply had fun.

In regards to question of their sexual orientation -

1 guy was 100% straight because his girlfriend was with him. She is hot and honestly I am as attracted to her just as much. She is not just good looking but just plain nice.

2 of the guys I am about 90% sure are straight. They didn't mention they had girlfriends, but they really seemed straight.

1 of the guys (21 year old blond, just permanently returned home from college, was in band and is not a part of the rest of the group) I think could be bi. Just a feeling.

Now that leaves Ryan (a Kurt Wild look alike). Last Sunday night a very hot 21 year old girl was talking to me and she basicly told me she wanted to jump Ryan's bones. She just wanted him. I told Ryan that she was interested in him and he said great, but never went near her. I asked him later after she left why he wasn't interested and he said he had a girlfriend. Last night the topic of Ryan having a girlfriend came up with one of his friends. Ryan's friend said that Ryan did not have a girlfriend. So Ryan i am not sure about.

Hi Canada. That sounds so cool. I too really enjoy hanging out with young guys, even if I don't have a chance to be with them sexually. It is just very cool to spend some time with them, and enjoy their youthful exuberance, and to enjoy the "eye candy". If anything more develops, all the better, but just being in their company is fun too.

And please let us know if anything develops with Ryan. He sounds very nice. Thanks.

Mike

 

[tampa24]

But then again, alot of the older guys here seem to be really attracted to young guys, so it would almost seem that older guys find men their own age not too appealing

There are always pitfalls when trying to generalize something personal like sexual attraction. Youthful looks are attractive to just about everyone of any age whether they are gay or straight. I would not say that gay guys find their own age group unappealling. There is something to be said for the level of comraderie that is there among people of your own age. There are certain decades and shared historical experiences that are significant for each age group. And to have that in common with someone is very attractive and comforting.

I had to laugh at myself over the past few years when I would see a guy with some grey hair and still find him to be sexually attractive. In our teens and 20's the majority of us think that that is not likely to ever happen. But it does! LOL I recently had a 73 year old gay neighbor tell me that sometimes he will see 3 generations of a family and he thinks they are all cute. He can't decide which one he wants more. LOL Is it the handsome 65 year old grandpa, the 40 year old son or the 20 year old grandson?

Just as in the straight world the guys like to brag if they are dating/having sex with or married to a woman who is alot younger than themselves. It's just part of the macho culture. It doesn't mean that guys don't like to date or marry women of their own age. Most successful gay couples (that I know of) in long term realationships are within 5 years of each other's age. I've known of a few with large age differences but they are the exception, not the rule.

I guess in conclusion to your original statement, it's not that guys find those of their own age to be UNattractive it's just that many of us find the looks of younger people to be MORE attractive. But of course that is merely the physical attributes. Most of us of all ages have far more to offer someone else and the the wrold in general than just our looks. And if we live long enough all of us will see our youthful beauty fade with time. It what's on the inside that we carry with us forever.

 

[Jayman01]

There are always pitfalls when trying to generalize something personal like sexual attraction. Youthful looks are attractive to just about everyone of any age whether they are gay or straight. I would not say that gay guys find their own age group unappealling. There is something to be said for the level of comraderie that is there among people of your own age. There are certain decades and shared historical experiences that are significant for each age group. And to have that in common with someone is very attractive and comforting.

I had to laugh at myself over the past few years when I would see a guy with some grey hair and still find him to be sexually attractive. In our teens and 20's the majority of us think that that is not likely to ever happen. But it does! LOL I recently had a 73 year old gay neighbor tell me that sometimes he will see 3 generations of a family and he thinks they are all cute. He can't decide which one he wants more. LOL Is it the handsome 65 year old grandpa, the 40 year old son or the 20 year old grandson?

Just as in the straight world the guys like to brag if they are dating/having sex with or married to a woman who is alot younger than themselves. It's just part of the macho culture. It doesn't mean that guys don't like to date or marry women of their own age. Most successful gay couples (that I know of) in long term realationships are within 5 years of each other's age. I've known of a few with large age differences but they are the exception, not the rule.

I guess in conclusion to your original statement, it's not that guys find those of their own age to be UNattractive it's just that many of us find the looks of younger people to be MORE attractive. But of course that is merely the physical attributes. Most of us of all ages have far more to offer someone else and the the wrold in general than just our looks. And if we live long enough all of us will see our youthful beauty fade with time. It what's on the inside that we carry with us forever.

I agree with you my good friend. I don't make it a point of going around trying to attract anyone. I believe that if I am just being myself people will naturally come and talk to me and vice versa. Eventually, we may find common ground and similar issues that we can both relate too. I look at and get to know the person behind the flesh regardless of age. You see; I believe in reincarnation. I really do not subscribe to the existence of a place known as hell. I see life pretty much as the transcendentalists did. Each lifetime is a new opportunity for our soul's spiritual growth. To me hell is just coming back to the earth plane for another lesson. Once we have learned all of the lessons of the flesh we are ready for our soul’s next level of ascension as we work our way back to the source. I see each person as an opportunity in my life to learn and grow regardless of age. Sometimes, I recognize them from past lives when we were close or even if our paths have crossed. I always ask my higher self and guides if there is any karma I need to clear here with this person. Through my acceptance of other people from all walks of life and diverse backgrounds I come to know myself better. It is through our similarities and not our differences that I find myself embracing life and begin to see all life through God’s divine consciousness and divine unconditional love.

Sometimes there is some physical attraction many times there is not. However; when there is a physical attraction that is when the life’s lessons really begin...

Thank you for letting me share my thoughts with you. Bless your hearts.

Be at peace. Nameste…

 

[denver0102]

Well coming from a young guys perspective....looks get you noticed but personality is what keeps you there.