Casper, what Mat said!
You don't have to do anything with someone just because he hits on you. If you are going to do this, do it with someone you think is hot, and more importantly, kind and trustworthy. That is kind of hard to know meeting someone in a bar. If you decide Mr. Right isn't there that night, go back to your hotel room alone. Nothing wrong in doing that, and I know your big bros here will agree.
Man, I sure wish one of the Forumites lived closer to you. I really wish someone could be with you to look out for you on Saturday night in OKC.
I'd like to see half a dozen of us there with you to watch your back. We'd be your chaperones and lo onto anyone who does you wrong!
Be safe, Casper.
Paris
Casper,
I hope you are not getting OD'd on all this advice. I totally agree with Mat and Paris. Just remember this: if it doesn't feel right (in your gut) that's OK. As the wisest of the wisest (the Great Yoda) preaches: PATIENCE.
You are truly one special guy. Look at all of us watching out for you as Paris noted above. I remember my first time going to a Gay Bar. I was never into the bar scene for two reasons: First I don't drink (except ice tea or ginger ale) and I hate cigarette smoke. Those two elements drinking and smoking which go hand in hand are two turnoffs for me. It took a couple of my friends to more or less con me into "taking the Plunge". To say I was not nervous, would be to lie to you.
As if things were not uptight enough for me there was a young guy who came up to me and started talking to me. Needless to say the heart started to pound. Each of us have in our own mysterious way of defining what we consider hot and what is not. WE can look at a Slim and a Tampa and say WOW, what Hotties. At the same time we can look at a Paris and Jayman and say Yuck. (Just using the avatars for the above as examples. We are pals, I think?). On the other hand the person next to you will see just the opposite. If we could figure out how/why this happens maybe we can cure the world's problems. But I digress from the subject.
Going back to "my guy" to quote my mom, "I've seen better heads on cabbage". From my point of view (be it right or wrong) and at the moment there was no interest on my part for wanting to engage nor encourage someone I had no interest in. So I very nicely and politely let him know I was not interested. I was not playing games or being hard to get (Now the rest of you guys, just knock it off, I know what your thinking, especially you Slim). Needless to say, he would not take no for an answer. He kept following me around trying to engage with me and I being still very nervous kept nicely saying no. After about 10 or 15 minutes one of my friends, who had abandoned me, returned. He asked me what was up and I filled him in. Well he went over to that guy and I guess gave him a tongue lashing and I never saw him again. I don't know what he said to him and I did not ask him to say anything. He did it to help me out.
The point of all this is not to freak you out, but to share a real life story. By going with people you know helps get you through that first time. Paris is so right about going with company to easy into it. I'm sure I'm not alone with this first time experience.
All of us at the forum just want to make sure your all right. Isn't it nice to know that in such a short time you have so many forumites wanting to be there for you.
Mark, thanks for creating first
Broke Straight Boys and then this wonder forum. Now we can indulge in porn and then give us all a helping hand.
Live Long and Prosper,
Vicekid
P.S. Slim, Jayman, Tampa & Paris thank you for allowing me to abuse (I mean use) you in the above. You know I love you all. Or is it Gremlin I Love. no
Logan?, Mike?, Alden? Jon?, Preston? Tyler? Tuscon? Oh, I GIVE UP.