Hey, guys,
I was fine with this interview. I thought that Sha did a good (and sensitive) job of interviewing the guys, so thank you, Sha! Let's also remember, though, this isn't "Oprah", or "Live at the Actors' Studio", let alone "Charlie Rose" ;-)
Personally, I wasn't offended by anything any of the models said, in the interview. Lexically (and ethically) speaking, "homophobic" is if someone says, "I hate gay people. I don't like them personally; I think their way of life should be outlawed" - or even worse things, along the further end of that continuum.
However, when a straight guy says, "I REALLY don't enjoy having sex with another guy - especially if I have to KISS him - because it grosses me out. . . ": that's not homophobia. It's . . . ahem. . .
heterosexuality ;-)))
I am 100 per cent gay - but I've been fortunate, in my life, to have had a lot of AMAZING, cute, heterosexual guy friends, who are 100 per cent straight. The gentler and more open-minded among them have always been totally open and accepting of who I am, and have never been unwilling to listen to my stories about what I am feeling, and what is going on in my life - - - a lot of them are so supportive, they are totally willing to give me a hug, when I am down: they are not afraid of just normal human affection. But none of them would ever have sex with another guy, because it would just totally gross/FREAK them OUT - they would have no interest in it, whatsoever. (And these are socially liberal, well-educated guys, with no axe to grind against gay people, whatsoever.)
So - I don't think, if the question is asked, you can really blame those
Broke Straight Boys models who are really straight, for honestly expressing how they feel about having sex with another man. If they honestly say, "I don't really enjoy sex with another guy", I am fine with taking that at face-value, as long as they are fine with people like me, who DO enjoy sex with another guy! As a lot of the models have shown, both in comments they have made on the videos, and here on the boards. Let's face it, these guys (the ones who are straight) are pushing their boundaries to make a little money - and the nicer ones are coming to appreciate their gay fans, as well. And I am good with that, full stop.
I am also OK with the fact that some (or maybe most) of the models who are really straight, find it more comfortable to perform with other models who are also, straight. Because, in some sense, it has just got to be (or at least SEEM) a little easier - no emotional entanglement, no sense that you are really involved in something that conflicts with your sense of self. (And that is what sexuality is all about, at the bottom line.)
For just this reason, I also think it is the biggest fallacy perpetrated on so many gay boards, that any guy who sucks a penis, or fucks another guy, or gets fucked by another guy, is (just because of those actions) necessarily less than 100 per cent straight. That view stems from a behaviorist, Skinnerian perspective on the world (the notion that behavior is the only thing that matters, not FEELINGS) - and I don't subscribe to that view. I think feelings, and what's inside one's heart and head, matter a whole lot more.
For example. I am 100 per cent gay. I have never kissed a girl. I have never held a girl's hand. I have never DATED a girl. (All the girls who asked me, I turned down, even from the age of 16 - because I knew it would be dishonest, and I knew I could take them precisely NOWHERE, emotionally.)
Still, I'm not BLIND. There are lots of girls, and women, out there (including a number on this board!!!) who are beautiful, kind, sweet, and sexy! I guess, if I looked like a young Kyle MacLachlan, or something (which I certainly do NOT!) - and I were short of money, and some "BrokeGAYGuys" scout said to me, "Hey, A - we'll pay you $ hundred to lick that girl, suck her all over, and make love to her, and even KISS her" ~ I bet I could do it!!! Because maybe I would need the money; maybe I would be charmed by her smile and sense of humour and personality; and maybe (in a moment of general horniness) I could say to myself - "Wow, she is a really goodlooking girl, and what the hell? It would be FUN to get off with her!" But even if I said all that, and
DID all that, it still wouldn't make me
STRAIGHT.
Just as a
human being, I can SEE that there are beautiful WOMEN out there, and, even though I have no desire for them, personally (SEXUALLY) I can still think it's wonderful and inspiring to see them getting sexual pleasure. . . And if I were paid to help them, I suppose I could do it, and might even think it was kind of FUN?!??! But that wouldn't make me even one per cent heterosexual - it would only make me
HUMAN. But. . . carrying this little thought-experiment to its conclusion. . . if I were getting paid to do that on a regular basis, I might feel a lot more comfortable if the girls I were getting paid to play with were actually lesbians, so I would KNOW they weren't getting attached to me, or making personal emotional CONNECTIONS to me, which I could never (in good conscience) reciprocate. . . .
So, all I would ask is, when you hear our favourite straight models being interviewed, and saying how they really feel about this job - please: remember that this IS a job for them (if they end up liking us as friends, on the board, that is just a bonus); what they are doing is obviously NOT what they like best, in bed (and they are doing us a favour, by showing us a little bit of their beauty in erotic circumstances); and, just
be kind to them.
After all, this is "
Broke Straight Boys" - and this is what we all signed up for. As you all know, I am just a fan of male beauty, generally - I don't care if the models are straight, gay, bi, or pansexual. But, since this is
Broke Straight Boys, and most of our models are, by definition, straight, I think we ought to respect them and care about them, just as they are, and for WHO they are. IF we can do that, I think, everybody wins.
And the VERY BEST THING that can come out of our interaction with the straight models on
Broke Straight Boys, I think, is that, despite their misgivings - because, of course the taboo on male-male sex, but even more, on male-male kindness and emotional intimacy, is so STRONG, in our culture - the more open-minded and inquiring models in the group may come to realize (and the best of them already know) that those of us who are 100 per cent confirmed homosexual guys are not ALWAYS bad people - in fact, the best of US are kind, caring, and friendly people, who are not only glad for the little "morale boost" these straight guys give us: we are also always there to respect OUR friends for who they are, and how they feel. That is a VERY positive outcome, for all our discussions, I think - and one that makes being part of the site, and part of this board, worthwhile
![Smile :) :)](data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7)
))
Last thing, on this topic: Oh, oh, oh. . . BEWARE the fantasy, that a really straight guy who tries gay sex a few times, and discovers it is fun; may try it a few more times, and find it is indispensable; and may try it a few times more, and then "convert". Though this is a myth commonly purveyed by a lot of North American sites - it is NEVER true. It NEVER HAPPENS.
Sure, some guys come to work at sites like
Broke Straight Boys because they are secretly curious (though that is the exceptional, rather than the usual case, I think): but, while the spectrum of human sexual inclination is complex and sometimes flexible, in my experience, a straight guy is always gonna be straight, and a gay guy is always gonna be gay. I have never known a truly straight guy who worked in gay modeling, EVER to become gay, because of his experiences on film ~ and honestly, I would never really WANT that, either. (I think, as members of a site like
Broke Straight Boys, we have to be careful about letting "wishful thinking" get the better of us ;-)
I think the best that can come of all our experiences on
Broke Straight Boys, is just for us to appreciate the beauty we see and hear - AND, come to appreciate one another, for who we ARE. Models, members, staff - everybody.
Those are my thoughts,
~ "A" XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
"I love you, just the way you are" ~ Billy Joel :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPiK_yGG8ag