mikeyank
Long time forumite
Yesterday Johnny made a forum post updating us on what's going on with his medical issues. But he made the post on the "Jared & Zach" thread, and I learned forum etiquette from former Broke Straight Boys forumite, joninliverton who taught me long along about the importance of posting things in the right place. lol
So paying homage to Jon and to be sure that all of Johnny's friends read his update of December 24, 2017, I've copied it and re-posted it here on the official "Johnny" thread. lol
So paying homage to Jon and to be sure that all of Johnny's friends read his update of December 24, 2017, I've copied it and re-posted it here on the official "Johnny" thread. lol
Nice post Studd. Well it being Christmas.
I will tell you all the truth..When I was in the Hosiptal getting ready for my back Surgery I was on the table Ready..They found something wrong with my heart.FUCK...
Back surgery postponed. I now have to have Heart Surgery first. SHOCK..I didn't say anything cause it makes me feel so Old.
I am a VERY VAIN Man. Thought this could not happen too me. Years of doing Coke and Fucking every night many many Party drugs.
Caught up with me. ( Never needles ) So much loss in my life.Scared to Death. Of what will be. But after a very scary couple of months.
Dark Dark weeks. I even tryed to kill myself did not think I could face what was coming. Put a plastic bag on my head. After a minute or two took it off.
Could not take a breath.lol Thought I would cut my wrist cut my wrist but just cleaned my bathroon did not want to make a mess.
So I decided I want to live.I have been more than Blessed with some wonderful people in my life that are going to be with me for the long run.
Can't believe how a few good people are there for me. Had to give up work the gym two things I loved the most.Lost 25 pounds all muscle.
Twenty years of working out..GONE..Cute Ass GONE. But I want to live. Maybe someday if I make it?? It will come back. That's what they tell me.
I faked the last few years hiding my pain. Now I have no more secrets. NONE..Have Doctors I Love..Even going to a therapist who I LOVE.
People told me for years to see one. I have held so much in. Lost everyone in my life. Thought I could handle it. I can't.
Need to get it out. Can talk about my faviorte thing ME..
Broke Straight Boys has been my friend for five years now. Could hide on the top of my bed and have friends. But I did fake allot..No one knew.
So Tuesday Heart Doctor then go from there.
I do want to thank a few people on Broke Straight Boys for there Love and support for such a long time. Most of them did not know how Fucked up I was.
Cause on the top of my bed with my computer I was not in pain.
Frist Mikeyank who has been my friend and support for almost five years. I even fooled him for a while.But every day these last .
few months has been my strenth.
I Love You Mike and Thank You. My New friend Rep. So glad we have become friends.You make me laugh. I really like You Allot.
My DEAR Friend Peter who can be a Bitch at times. LOL But I really Love You. So Much. eleyot1 who makes me wish I were 27 again.Beautiful Boy..
.Rafe I just love you. Buckeye with all you have been through. Makes me feel so good about myself.
Stowe You are a Sweet Wonderful Man. Even it You don't think so. I know You are.. But I won't tell anyone.XOXO..
Tampa my friend Never a unkind word. You are Love. Another silly Johnny post. But I just need to tell You all what I am feeling this morining.
I feel You all here. I love You all. Strange falling in Love with people on a GAY FORUM..But my feelings are Real..
Thank You All. And a verytoo you all. I really care..And all the other Broke Straight Boys Formites Merry Christmas.
Love Johnny..OH.. And Tanner..I LOVE YOU..lol OH and Kisses too You another. Quiet but alway's there.Merry Christmas xo
Gonna press submit mistakes and all. lol And BIG HUG Studd.